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3 Reasons Why I Decided To Have A Second Child?

From the time my older child was about 5 years old, I started thinking about a second child, but I was never convinced enough to plan further. I think being convinced and planning for a second one is a really tough decision.

After my first child was born, I was very clear that I am not having a second child, because I did not want to go through the whole experience of pregnancy again.

I guess many moms would relate to this — pregnancy and motherhood is not easy, after all. It takes a toll on physical and mental health of women.

Yet here I am penning this article 1.5 months after delivering my second one.

So what changed?

From the time my older one was about 5 years old, I started thinking about a second child, but I was never convinced enough to plan further. I think being convinced and planning for a second one is a really tough decision.

Most people want a kid, we only question ourselves when it comes to the second. Also, my post-partum health was not good, so I never felt positive about going through it again.

But I always thought — later in life I would regret not giving a sibling to my older one, and by then it may be too late. I had these conflicting thoughts for 3 years!

I read every article that listed the pros and cons of having a second baby, and I was more convinced about the cons, maybe because I was never ready.

Covid brought a new perspective

When COVID hit us in 2020, everything changed. Yes, it changed for everyone in the world, but for me, it brought from a new perspective. COVID’s second wave in India was pretty bad, and it claimed many lives.

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We heard cases where parents lost their lives to COVID and their children were left to fend for themselves. And what if the child is a single child? I couldn’t imagine the plight of such kids. That was the first thing that changed my mind.

Being alone in the midst of personal loss is heartbreaking

In future, I didn’t want my son to be alone in this world. Life doesn’t come with any guarantee — after us, he needs some emotional support and only siblings can offer that.

Friends do help, but sibling bond is very different. I also saw this when my MIL was ailing. So this was the next thing that changed my mind.

Sibling bond is irreplaceable

I lost my FIL 10 years back and my MIL was not keeping well since 2020. Over time, her health deteriorated, and we knew what to expect. During these testing times, I realized how important it is to have a sibling.

I saw the bond between my husband and his sister (who lives abroad) strengthen. They knew they need to be there for each other. While my MIL was ailing, they were constantly connected and were each other’s emotional support. That was the second time I realized the importance of a sibling.

So here I am with two kids who are 8 years apart! And it is so heartening to see my older one play with my newborn.

Image Source: Yogendra Singh via corelens, free on Canva Pro

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