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The idea of 'you'll get married sometime, and there is some house which is yours' that our girls are fed while growing up can lead to almost comically tragic circumstances. Read one such personal account.
The idea of ‘you’ll get married sometime, and there is some house which is yours’ that our girls are fed while growing up can lead to almost comically tragic circumstances. Read one such personal account.
Author’s note – The title of the article may give you an impression that this article is written by a woman who has been married for 30 years now. This is not true, but this is indeed a story of a girl who is trying to be a good daughter-in-law for 30 years – Scroll down to find out HOW.
I have been a decent girl all my life. (Don’t ask me How, ask me Why!)
I think I took that advice very seriously. For a long part of my life, every time I stepped out of home, I felt as if my life partner was finally going to meet me that day.
If there were any eligible bachelor in my surroundings, I would always behave at my best self – soft, sophisticated, warm, loving, sober, pretty, and what not. If there were even any decent old people around me, I would still behave at my best self, thinking they might be looking for a daughter-in-law for their adorable son or relatives’ son or someone else’s son.
Oh, God – I realize I was such an idiot!
Almost 30 years of decency has gotten me nothing!
Well out of sheer desperation of finding a life partner, I got myself registered on some matrimonial sites a few months back.
I became the primary contact person on my profile. It’s been a most fun, and a frustrating experience at the same time. At times I have talked to some very nice parents and amazing guys, and at times I have literally wanted to kill the person on the line.
Last week I got a call from an aunty who was looking for an adorable daughter-in-law for her godly son. (Ugh). Her opening line was that she was “ladke ki maa”. I felt an instant wave of decency within. I pitched my voice lower, soft and decent, thinking she could be my future mother-in-law. She started asking me endless (and stupid) questions, without introducing herself or her son.
After few minutes, I gently asked her, “What is your son’s name?” She didn’t answer that, and instead told me that she would like to talk to my father.
Well, I am glad my decency doesn’t last for long now! I said, “I don’t think you are going to need my father’s number- Give me your son’s details and ask him to call me. If I like him, only then I am going to entertain this discussion further!” I felt an instant wave of deep satisfaction and joy within.
My 30 years of trying to be a good daughter-in-law had finally taken the back seat for once and forever!
Image source: a still from the movie Hum Aapke Hain Kaun
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I am an odd bird! read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
As long as teachers are competent in their job, and adhere to the workplace code of conduct, how does it matter what they do in their personal lives?
A 30 year old Associate Professor at a well-known University, according to an FIR filed by her, was forced to resign because the father of one of her students complained that he found his son looking at photographs of her, which according to him were “objectionable” and “bordering on nudity”.
There are two aspects to this case, which are equally disturbing, and which together make me question where we are heading as a society.
When the father of an 18 year old finds his son looking at photographs of a lady in a swimsuit, he can do many things. What this parent allegedly did was to dash off a letter to the University which states: