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When a woman says NO, she means NO, even if she might seem fair game to those who think she should subscribe to society's idea of propriety to be respected!
When a woman says NO, she means NO, even if she might seem fair game to those who think she should subscribe to society’s idea of propriety to be respected!
The recently released movie, ‘Pink’ is a must see for all women. The movie clearly shows how misogyny is deeply entrenched in our society.
As per the patriarchal society we live in, there is a set mold within which a woman should fit. If she doesn’t follow certain rules or a set pattern, her character is questioned. This movie only brings forward what some of us face on a daily basis.
A few years back British journalist Leslee Udwin made a documentary called, ‘India’s Daughter’. Though it was not allowed to be aired, the youtube video of it went viral.
It had the interview of one of Nirbhaya’s killers. There was a complete lack of remorse at his end. He was of the opinion that if a girl chose to wear jeans, and go out in night with a man, she was a fair game. It was chilling to realise the kind of mind set Indian men have.
One may argue that he was not educated and illiteracy is the root of the issue. However that is not true. I remember some years back, when I was still unmarried, I had a rather nasty colleague. He had once said to me, “You are the kind of girl, who is fit to be a girlfriend, but not a wife.” His analysis was based on the fact that I wore western clothes, went out in the nights with my friends which included males and was vocal about my dislikes. My only response to him had been, “I pity the girl who will marry you.”
Unfortunately this man belonged to the so-called young India, who are modern in their thinking and living. However, this so-called contemporary thinking is limited to the western brands they wear and sleek cars they drive in. Their thinking is still medieval and backward.
I have still not understood why there should be different set of rules for men and women. If a boy goes out late, drinks, wears latest fashion he is considered cool, however, if a girl does the same things she is branded as the scarlet woman. Gender bias cannot be wiped out till this mind set is not removed.
This can happen only when a woman can roam around free in the night without worrying about what she is wearing or where she is going. When she can be sure that the people she has chosen to be with will not become predators suddenly.
This transition will have to begin right from the grass root level. Every boy should be taught by his parents, teachers and other elders he looks up to, so that he learns that men and women are equal. It does not matter how she chooses to lead her life or what her likes and dislikes are, it does not give him a right to judge her. She is a thinking, functioning human with decision making powers just like he is.
And when a woman says no, she means no.
Image source: shutterstock
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Rajshri Deshpande, who played the fiery protagonist in Trial by Fire along with Abhay Deol speaks of her journey and her social work.
Rajshri Deshpande as the protagonist in ‘Trial by Fire’, the recent Netflix show has received raving reviews along with the show itself for its sensitive portrayal of the Uphaar Cinema Hall fire tragedy, 1997 and its aftermath.
The limited series is based on the book by the same name written by Neelam and Shekhar Krishnamoorthy, who lost both their children in the tragedy. We got an opportunity to interview Rajshri Deshpande who played Neelam Krishnamoorthy, the woman who has been relentlessly crusading in the court for holding the owners responsible for the sheer negligence.
Rajshri Deshpande is more than an actor. She is also a social warrior, the rare celebrity from the film industry who has also gone back to her roots to give to poverty struck farming villages in her native Marathwada, with her NGO Nabhangan Foundation. Of course a chance to speak with her one on one was a must!
“What is a woman’s job, Ramesh? Taking care of parents-in-law, husband, children, home and things at work—all at the same time? She isn’t God or a superhuman."
The arrays of workstations were occupied by people peering into their computer screens. The clicks of keyboard keys were punctuated by the occasional footsteps moving around to brainstorm or collaborate with colleagues in their cubicles. Most employees went about their tasks without looking at the person seated on either side of their workstation. Meenakshi was one of them.
The thirty-one-year-old marketing manager in a leading eCommerce company in India sat straight in her seat, her eyes on the screen, her fingers punching furiously into the keys. She was in a flow and wanted to finish the report while the thoughts and words were coming effortlessly into her mind.
Natu-Natu. The mellifluous ringtone interrupted her thoughts. She frowned at her mobile phone with half a mind to keep it ringing until she noticed the caller’s name on the screen, making her pick up the phone immediately.
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