Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
Movies have systematically glorified motherhood and in the process have made life so much more difficult for women, who as moms are put on a pedestal, and prevented from being their own person.
It’s strange how much movies influence our lives. There is one such character that has been glorified and worshiped time and again in our movies. The role of a mother.
Some of our ad makers have used mother’s love as a bait to sell products.They have used words like being protected, loved and taken care of which are all references to a mother’s love to brand their products. From the goodness of mosquito repellents and food items to skin care products and everything else, it was being compared to that of a mom’s love and care.
Being a mother to a growing up toddler I can definitely vouch for the constant feeling of the concern that moves in the minds of a mother. We are forever worrying about the well-being of our children.
The continual efforts that are made to ensure a child is well fed, well dressed, healthy, well educated, and a million other things are all supposed to be a mother’s responsibility, if the movies that have puffed up a mother’s role are to be believed. This has almost ruined some things for us women, through their larger than life projection.
A mom is expected to be an expert nursing a new born, and all hell breaks loose if a new mother is unable to breastfeed for reasons unknown even to the mother herself.
You are an evil mother if your child is formula fed. I was born as a 7-month premature child. I was formula fed throughout, and I turned out OK. I happened to excel at sports, drama and literature as well. My mother was unable to breastfeed because her nutritional level during pregnancy was low.
You weren’t raised well if you dared to answer back to or your in laws.
The saas-bahu sagas that get aired on T.V expect you to be the forever sacrificing bahu/ saas/ mother come what may. There are a few people who expect their daughters and daughters in law to adjust for everything despite their countless degrees. Someone who I know just blamed my friend’s parents for not raising their daughter well, because she happened to ‘argue’ with her in laws who wanted her to lay her career to rest.
You are expected to sacrifice your career for your child and husband.
Just like in the movies, many women are expected to put their home duties above everything else. It doesn’t really matter even if she earns more than their son. The salary soon becomes comes in the way of marital ego.
You CANNOT yell at your child in public.
Even though there have been movies that have shown mother’s killing their own child to justify the victory of good over evil, yet, you would be committing a crime if you yelled, corrected or tried to discipline your child in public.
You cannot eat your meals before anyone else.
Well yes, there still households that exist where the womenfolk are supposed to eat last. In some households, they are even expected to eat what’s left over for some strange belief of it bringing long life to the husbands. There is an ad doing rounds on the social media that talks about taking care of the one who takes care of the entire house, the woman.
I eat before I feed my child, at least that way I know how much he eats and I can even moderate the food cooked as per his taste.
I’m sure women across the world will have their own experiences and observations to share. If movies are the yardstick, there surely have been movies that have laid stress on a woman’s career being important, or on strength of a woman? We have seen movies where woman have planned and plotted against the wrong doers and attained victory. We have also seen movies where woman have decided to walk away from misery of any kind.
We woman are strong and we don’t need anyone to prove that to us. We also don’t need anyone to glorify our roles. We can be everything we want to be.
A version of this was first published here.
Image source: a still from the movie Badhaai Ho
read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
Please enter your email address