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What’s The ‘Good News’?! Woman, You’re A Lot More Than A Baby-Making Machine!

Indians believe that every woman MUST marry at the 'right' age, and every married woman MUST have a baby. It bothers us when a woman decides to be child free.

The idea of progeny is so ingrained in our society that people often fail to look behind what a woman actually wants. It is often an idea taken for granted that, if a woman is married, she has deliver a baby within one year.

From friends and social gatherings to corporate catch-ups, every conversation circles back to whether a woman is married or not. If she’s not married, it’s met with aghast expressions and people wishing her to ‘find the right one soon’. If she’s married, the very next question is if she has a child, a ‘yes’ simply ends the conversation as the answer is something everyone wants to hear. A ‘no’ is taken in many ways, while some offer a pitiful look and wish her to have a child soon, the others remind her of her age and how menopause is prone to hit her soon. There are some, who even go to the extent of wishing her the best to have a child by suggesting things that can help her conceive.

While all these efforts are acknowledged, not a single person thinks ‘being child-free is a choice’ or ‘it is her wish, let her have a child whenever she wants to’!

Having faced many such situations myself, I often wonder:

Dear Men,

How does the married life treat you? Do you have people subjecting you to glares for not wearing all the accessories that show the world you are married? Are you subjected to questions about your married life and progeny? Do people remind you that your age or your other physical aspects might make it impossible to have a baby in the near future?

While your hormones are waging their own war and your mental health is on a fine line, are you ostracized by your peers and friends for not having a baby? Is the current situation in the world adding to your anxiety?

Are you also made to feel like it is a crime to have not had a child within a year of marriage?

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What’s the good news, dear men?

Image source: a still from the series Ghum Hain Kiskey Pyaar Mein

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Ragini Ravichandran

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