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Alpha Male Problem — Why Men Orient Their Lives Around Hating Women?

Alpha male, the term was born and co-opted by humans based on a faulty research conducted in the 60s. The aspiration to be an alpha male is the fuel of toxic masculinity culture.

[The term, alpha male, was coined and co-opted by humans based on series of faulty research conducted in the 60s and 70s about wolf packs in captivity. Since then, this misinterpreted term has become part of fiction, pop-culture, business world and manhood.

The aspiration to be an alpha male is a key fuel in the rise of toxic masculinity culture. This idea of manhood has been amplified and contributed to, by podcasts, YouTube channels, blogs, twitter pages, discord groups spearheaded by likes of Andrew Tate]

Andrew Tate is an American-British internet celebrity and kick-boxer. Following his kick-boxing career, Tate offered paid courses, memberships through his website and later rose to fame through influencer marketing.

Tate’s misogynistic vitriol on social media has led to him being banned from various platforms. He began receiving negative attention for his tweets surrounding the Harvey Weinstein allegations, where he stated that sexual assault victims hold accountability for their assaults.

In 2017, Tate falsely said that depression is not a real illness and in an older, now-deleted video posted to his YouTube channel, Tate admits that he chose to move to Romania as it’s easier to be absolved of rape charges there.

Despite being thwarted, Tate continues to garner support, many accusing his social media bans of censorship. Moreover, Tate is not the only man who preaches similar views, cue the alpha male influencers/celebrities/podcasters.

The alpha male podcast provided platform to the insecurities of cisgender men

The now mass-banned Andrew Tate and the Alpha Male Podcast wave is a colossally useless phenomenon. Set in motion by the ideological hunger of typically cisgender heterosexual men— seeking refuge in radical explanations for— increased exposure to feminism and a significant rise in the sense of gender equality among women.

As a result of which, modern women are becoming increasingly selective in choosing male companions— especially as partners—not setting the bar as high in my opinion!

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As wanting to be surrounded by physically and mentally healthy, hard-working men with balanced opinions and a kind, accommodating rational outlook towards the world is a bare minimum expectation.

However, it has proven to be quite a roadblock for some men. Men who have been constantly fed on the colostrum of sexist values favouring them, setting them up for more perceived success as reality suggests, which is quite a shock as they go out into the world!

Seeing that women, who were supposed to fawn for them— titillate them, give them easy access to their bodies, appreciate and praise them for the smallest deeds and virtues, design their appearance around visually pleasing them!

And then magically morph into reserved, monogamous, virginal, deeply submissive wives, swearing eternal servitude to them— are much more intricate than the said.

And most women want nothing to do with alpha male!

Alpha male revival is a consequence of modern men realizing that independent, modern free-thinking women want nothing to do with them!

Unless men are respectful, humble, liberal, humane and gentle and men realizing that even if they are all those things, the ultimate choice to be in a relationship lies with a woman! And she may decide to be or not be in one on her terms.

Similarly, on their terms, women may decide to dress themselves in clothes of their choice, speak as they want, work as they want and also avoid or participate in sexual activities as they want.

This isn’t a novel conception as men have lived and breathed this way since time immemorial, however, to see women take the liberty and have the licence to do the same is akin to a power imbalance. Or power being taken away, especially for men who have leeched off their masculinity and masculine validation for all it’s worth and little else.

When being a man is all you feel you have achieved in life, equality feels like oppression, rather a call for regression to cave-man ideology to feel if only an ounce of purpose in this new world for all that is becoming more and more alien to men whose world has always been about them.

Theirs is a screaming insecurity that sees power as a monopoly by force rather than a shared asset. The discrepancy between the entitlement that young men have grown up with and the self-sufficiency of women, their power to act on their wishes instead of being at the sanction-end of another, is a bitter shock.

What calls for introspection and self-improvement for now being seen as less eligible as a companion is for some.

A hunt instead to blame and bash women as revenge for their own incapacities, feigning aggressive physical and mental independence from them, which is ironic.

Self-proclaimed alpha men, such as Andrew Tate, make their principal content, views, popularity and income— based off of their views on women— strongly orienting their sad world around that same gender binary.

Which shows dissatisfaction and a need to verbally repeat and realize their own value by comparison to women, contrary to their assertions that women’s presence is subordinate and of no value to them.

Everything should be about me— the man

From the same inferiority complex comes the transformation of the male self-orientation, the self-projected assumption that “Why should everything be about her?” comes the assertion that “Everything should be about me,” which is the inchoate poison that forms the backbone of sexist, chauvinistic, misogynistic discourse.

Andrew Tate isn’t the first red flag of this century. Prior to Tate, another figure with considerable influence holding similar views was Donald Trump.

A walking caustic, uneducated opinion, who was infamously caught saying “Grab ’em by the p*ssy,” exposing a larger filing cabinet wherein women are mere objects squeezing into tiny, different compartments of a man’s world, building nothing but a dichotomy between a sexy, intriguing temptress versus bland, virgin wife while being bashed for appearing much more like either.

This was resonant of the aggressive backlash from Tate supporters when he got banned from all major social media platforms for “hate speech” and “violating community guidelines,” in essence “ruining the minds of impressionable young men for the worse.”

After remarking on public platforms that women who are raped are partially responsible for their attacks, detailing how he might attack women, and went on to criticize people who seek mental health treatment.

Radical men hit back by saying how women on social media who expose their bodies and use OnlyFans are also responsible for ruining the minds of young men, but the argument simply doesn’t stand.

Women who expose their bodies or practice sex work aren’t promoting rape culture by actively telling men to come attack them or that it is okay to attack someone, glorifying it as a virtue of an ideal man, as Tate did.

Wearing scanty clothes or being a sex worker isn’t an invitation or a licence to outrage a woman’s modesty, to touch, harass, abuse or assault her because rape lies outside the victim’s age, clothing or profession.

Moreover, social media algorithms work by personal preferences for content, and at no point will recommend content to include Instagram models or influencers unless the individual is actively following them.

Don’t date young vulnerable women in need of money, and call them gold diggers.

Which is the underlying irony of alpha male complaints against women— they despise gold diggers yet avoid independent, working women with opinions, they deem women unwise and unable to make decisions for themselves yet seek young, impressionable girls for relationships!

They despise scantily clad women who are sexually active while seeking women who offer them physical favours, while seeing rape and coercion as appropriate means to force women who are unwilling to do the same.

The need to classify women based on sexuality is a symptom of being unable to view anyone, even other men, as holistic, multifaceted beings who are beyond Neanderthal conceptions of male traits and female traits.

Deadweight statements such as “It is okay for men to cheat”, “Women cannot have multiple sexual partners”, “Women must be disciplined”, “Women must take accountability for enticing men”, are enabling commandments only for the weakest of men.

Men who have no sense of self, moral values and basic respect for other human beings, which is far from what they like to call the “high-value man.”

High-value men need not verbally assert their value, which is an unsaid trait. They do not blame others for their own lacking and hold themselves accountable for their actions and how they affect others.

Such men are not afraid to be empathetic and emotional for their own health and others’. A high-value man values everyone and is a source of safety, strength, courage and comfort to those around him, contrary to the squealing sewer rats of society that are misogynistic men.

Image Source: Still from Trailer of  Pyaar Ka Punchnama 2, edited on CanvaPro

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About the Author

Ria Tirkey

I am Ria from New Delhi. I did my Bachelors in Political Science and History and am currently pursuing my Masters in Political Science from University of Delhi and Postgraduate Diploma in Criminal Justice from read more...

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