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I was an early eater, but being married into a business family meant that I couldn’t eat before my husband did. Thus, I started munching on snacks and my body began changing.
I’m married to the love of my life and things are as good as can be. The things I’m going to write about next may not please many people as they might have their own thoughts on it.
This is my third year as a married woman, and honestly, the initial two years took a lot from me.
I recall the times when I wanted to give up on my relationship, but I opted to be quiet for a few days instead. I fought too for the things that irritated me, and as a result, I became really sad for a while. But today, I am happy I never gave up.
While a few things are still the same, some changed in the best way possible, while I adjusted to some other things. I learnt a lesson that when one gets married, they shouldn’t open up, initially. I was asked to pretend a bit, otherwise, I would have to bear the burden of truth later.
I hardly heard such comments or so-called lessons from the women in my family. Apart from these teachings about marriage, there are so many sex educators around me. Let me tell you about one of the lessons I got from them post marriage.
I was told that I have to make my husband happy, no matter what. Gosh, when I entered that phase, honestly, it was nothing like what they had told me. It was something new that I explored every day.
After one year of establishing a successful understanding in my marriage, one day, during a random chat, my husband opened up about our “first night” and how he pretended for a while so that I don’t judge him on the very first night.
There is more to this. I was told that my moves in bed might give a signal to my husband that I am a pro and “have had it a lot many times” before. This lesson amazed me. I mean, “sex” is something which needs to be uncovered and an important element of a happy marriage, then why do I even need to pretend?
On the contrary, I found that my husband and I bonded a bit more when I gave up pretentious acts, other than in a funny way to get his attention.
Everything was smooth until the Covid-19 spell fell on us. I have read and heard a lot of stories about how this virus invaded numerous households, but it took the form of a core fear in my husband, till recently. He started maintaining a physical distance from me. Things got so bad that I had to take bath even for merely stepping onto the front porch of our house. I was being dictated by him.
My husband started distancing himself from me when Covid-19 began, because of a fear of spreading or contracting the virus.
Things got even worse when I was not allowed to see my parents because my father was going to work every day as his work demanded it. I was quarantined twice, just because I sneezed and my body temperature was 99 degrees Celsius, which is normal for my body.
This scenario went on till a few months ago, but I tried to understand his psychology, instead of taking any hasty decisions. I have seen relationships ending for such reasons. People say that marriage is a balance of a lot of things… Indeed, it is!
While fighting these things, I was going through some other stuff which no one prepared me for. For instance, how different food habits in the new home suddenly change your body.
Growing up, you develop certain habits which are not easy to let go of. I was an early eater, but being married into a business family meant that I couldn’t eat before my husband did. Thus, I started munching on snacks and my body began changing. I started facing many issues like bloating and craving salt. These changes were collectively harming my mental health.
Do you know your 20s are different from your 30s, not just economically, but also in the slightest of things like how your body reacts to food and water?
Reducing fat is literally a challenge for me now. I always had a lean body. But now, increased responsibilities, managing work, and my tired body, did not allow me to exercise often. So, I struggled with many options, both online and offline.
I tried Zumba, joining a gym, running etc., but not being consistent didn’t help me. Moreover, skipping meals or sustaining myself on smoothies also didn’t help, as it gave way to gastritis.
I have realised that my body needs more attention than ever. Everybody around you wants you to be healthy, in order to be ready for pregnancy.
This is yet again another change which my body might not be ready for just yet!
These are some things which we aren’t supposed to talk about, as either people make fun of it, or give you suggestions you don’t want. However, I chose to listen to what my heart guided me to do, and wrote this personal account down.
Published here first.
Image source: a still from Lust Stories
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A passionate scribbler and wishful bread earner. A working professional in an embassy and a freelancer French language trainer. A voracious reader and loves to connect readers and writers. Author of Ibiza by Geetika Kaura ( read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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Mostly Normal is a book of innocence, longing, filial love, angst and acceptance, encapsulating a gamut of human emotions within its lightweight edifice. The book touches the human heart and will stay with you.
Some books enthral you till the last page, and then there are those that you stop reading after turning a few pages. Some books are a one-time read, while you carry some books with you long after you have read them. Then, once in a while, a book hits you so close to home that you find it difficult to slot into any category.
I will put Priyadeep Kaur’s Mostly Normal (BookSoul Reads, 2022) in this last bracket.
At a little less than hundred pages, Mostly Normal is a testimony of the power of words to inspire, irrespective of their length.
Most women do not get to live their lives the way they want, on their own terms. So why should they be tied down in their old age?
Every morning, while dropping the kids at the bus stop, I find a grandfather waiting with his granddaughter. I see him again when I fetch the kids. This has been the pattern for the last few years.
He is seen actively participating in his granddaughter’s activities, from morning and evening walks to attending her parent-teachers meeting, sending her for extracurricular activities to even planning her birthday party. He is admired by all. He is appreciated for making himself useful in his old age. People rave that the doting grandfather is doing his duty towards his children and grandchildren. The much-admired grandfather is also a widower, having lost his wife years ago to chronic disease. It’s also to be noted that both his son and daughter-in-law are working parents.
Every day, the onlookers appreciate his sense of duty and dedication. They say that this is how the elderly should keep themselves occupied. They should bring up their grandchildren while their children go off to work.
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