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The shackles of patriarchy still need to be broken. But it isn't an easy task when women are conditioned by it too. Often their toxic behaviour nurtures it!
The shackles of patriarchy still need to be broken. But it isn’t an easy task when women are conditioned by it too. Often their toxic behaviour nurtures it!
Let’s admit it – we live in a patriarchal society. Things have improved but we still need a lot of improvement. Everyday I read about unhappy women and see some around me too. Women are battered, emotionally abused, forcefully married, made to do housework without rest, unappreciated, and overworked. Who is the reason for such a sad state of women – the men? Yes! But it’s not just the men. Some times, it is women who also promote patriarchy.
A number of women are made to feel like outsiders by their mothers-in-law. They are ill-treated badly and made to feel that the house is “not theirs.” When a girl child is born, often, more than men it is the women who lament.
Women in abusive marriage for years want their daughters to get married! And it is mothers who mostly teach their daughters to be subservient, adjust, and prioritise everyone else but themselves. They tell their daughters to tolerate it, no matter how bad the situation is.
It is the neighbourhood women who gossip about the way girls dress and look. Or the ones who keep track of how late the girls return, whom they hang out with, or even why a girl isn’t married yet.
Many mothers still don’t teach their son house work, discipline their bad behavior or misogynistic mindset. These mothers are as responsible as fathers for the ‘raja-beta’ syndrome or the ‘boys will be boys’ trope.
There are many female bosses worse than the male bosses. Instead of encouraging them, these women try to pull their female subordinates down.
Everyday around us, we see and read about toxic mothers-in-law, sisters-in-law, bosses, neighbours, ‘friends,’ or ever own mother who do not support their own gender. We hear about women who are vicious and toxic. Till women shun this toxicity, patriarchy will continue to prevail.
Time to break the chain women!
Picture credits: Still from Bollywood movie Hum Saath Saath Hain
I am a travel expert by profession and an avid blogger by passion. Parenting and women's issues are something that are close to my heart and I blog a lot about them. read more...
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Does Ranbir Kapoor expressing his preferences about Alia using lipstick really make him a toxic husband?
Sometime back, a video of Alia Bhatt with Vogue went viral where she shares her go-to make-up routine and her unique way to apply lipstick. It went viral not for the quirkiness but because she said that after applying the lipstick, she “rubs it off” because her then boyfriend and now husband – Ranbir Kapoor likes her natural lip colour and asks her to “wipe it off”, whenever they are out on a date night.
Netizens had gone crazy over this video, calling RK toxic and not respecting AB’s choice to wear makeup. I saw the video a couple of times to understand the reason behind the uproar but I failed to understand it. I read many comments and saw people saying that asking your partner or dictating terms on how they should wear makeup is a major sign to leave the person.
Modesty or humility is viewed as the hallmark of a well-brought-up girl, which makes it hard for us to be open to any real compliments without feeling like an imposter.
Why is accepting that compliment so hard?
Colleagues: Have you lost weight? You look good!
She (who has spent months doing Keto and weights): It’s the dress that’s making me look thinner!
Guests: Your house is so beautiful and neat!
She (who spent the last five hours mopping and polishing): It could be tidier; there is just so much dust.
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