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Why should a mother be a good cook to be a good mom? And why are fathers exempt from this measure of good parenthood?
The dinner I made last night had a little less salt and my husband facetiously remarked – “You have been at home for a year now. Why don’t you learn to cook? Our son will be a year old now. You better pull up your socks, else he won’t be able to boast of his mother’s culinary skill and Maa ke haath ka khaana.” He laughed and I smirked. It ended there, but for me, the statement haunted through the night.
One distressed half of me was wondering, why did my cook go on a week long leave? Had he been here, I would have escaped such remarks.
But the other self-assured half was throwing questions for confrontation. Can a only a good cook make a good mother? Those mothers who don’t cook, are not good mothers? How come fathers are good fathers, when they don’t cook? Is cooking the only desired trait of a good mother?
My sanguine self woke up and assured me that a mother is a mother. No matter what the world thinks of her, she is the brightest star for her children. Her children always look upto her for the selfless love she has endowed on them. It is only her children who can feel the warmth of love and smell the fragrance of care with which their mother feeds them.
For her children, it doesn’t matter if she cooks good, bad or not at all. Because even a cook can do that for them. But a cook can definitely not understand the anxieties of children without their expressing it.
Only a mother can hear the unsaid words of her child. Only a mother can read his mind. It is a mother (if biological) who carries her child for 9 months in her womb. And it is a mother who brings them to this beautiful world.
Mother is the epitome of love, care and warmth. No adjective can justify her role and no author can define her completely. A mother’s love is as deep as the ocean and as endless as the sky.
It is only our Indian society that has defined that a girl making perfect round chapattis can be a perfect ‘bahu‘ and mother. But according to me, a family is kept happy not by expertly cooked food but by the positive aura of values, principles and respect for each other.
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I am a mother of a baby boy, a management graduate and a multi-faceted professional mom making home a sweeter place to live in. read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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