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When it comes to kids, parents tend to take up a lot more on them than it is considered sane to. Is a difficult child really the parents' fault?
When it comes to kids, parents tend to take up a lot more on them than it is considered sane to. Is a difficult child really the parents’ fault?
If a 3 year old sneezes, our mind consciously or sub consciously goes back the day or a couple of days to what he or she has eaten, where they have been, how long they were out, etc. – to gauge where the sneeze came from, and then start guessing what it would lead to?
A little girl in my son’s pre-school never seems to get her art work home, well, because she doesn’t do any! The mother blames her less artsy self for why her daughter doesn’t seem to make a relationship with paints. Maybe it is or maybe it is not! Maybe her little one might take to art a little later with no looking back!
Despite the fact that our children carry our genes, they are their own individual selves. And more often than not, their likes, dislikes, the way they behave should all be attributed to their person.
A child feeds on his or her mother’s fears and insecurities. This is something we conclude when we see a little one really attached to her mother. Refusing to leave her side at the playground or to go to school. If this child is one against many other kids who happily walk into that class, all fingers point to the mother.
This should not be the case. Because all that it is, is a kid who is just a little more sensitive and is just facing a little more trouble to leave his mother than anyone else.
Food habits of a child very easily track down to that of his or her household. It is partly true; as she is not going to develop a taste for food which she has never tasted. However it is also true that food habits change with time. And it is a very common experience with parents that despite having similar dishes on the table for years, the child suddenly stops eating something and never touches it again. I know of a 7 year old who loved sushi the first time he ate it!
Something known as nutrigenomics is a study which relates genes to our taste buds. But it is not the only factor. Culture, ethnicity, individual experiences and a complicated science of protein receptors on the tongue also play an equally important role.
Hence moms, chill out if your child rejects certain foods.
If a child gets difficult to handle or shows bully-like behaviour, we end up thinking that he might be getting too much privilege at home, and expects getting spoilt outside home too. Or that he is emulating something he sees at home.
However home or parents are not the only factors which impact a child.
He or she could just be a strong headed individual who wants to get her own way. Or it could be the other extreme where they might be struggling with insecurities, anger, hurt due to a one time or recurring incident at either the school, home or anywhere in the community which the kid gets involves with.
To nurture a child to grow up to be a self-sufficient positive individual is definitely a responsibility of the parents. But to take the onus of each and every trait of his is surely something care-givers do not need to indulge in.
Image source: pixabay
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As he stood in front of his door, Nishant prayed that his wife would be in a better mood. The baby thing was tearing them apart. When was the last time he had seen his wife smile?
Veena got into the lift. It was a festival day, and the space was crammed with little children dressed in bright yellow clothes, wearing fancy peacock feather crowns, and carrying flutes. Janmashtami gave her the jitters. She kept her face down, refusing to socialize with anyone.
They had moved to this new apartment three months ago. The whole point of shifting had been to get away from the ruthless questioning by ‘well-wishers’.
“You have been married for ten years! Why no child yet?”
I huffed, puffed and panted up the hill, taking many rest breaks along the way. My calf muscles pained, my heart protested, and my breathing became heavy at one stage.
“Let’s turn back,” my husband remarked. We stood at the foot of Shravanbelagola – one of the most revered Jain pilgrimage centres. “We will not climb the hill,” he continued.
My husband and I were vacationing in Karnataka. It was the month of May, and even at the early hour of 8 am in the morning, the sun scorched our backs. After visiting Bangalore and Mysore, we had made a planned stop at this holy site in the Southern part of the state en route to Hosur. Even while planning our vacation, my husband was very excited at the prospect of visiting this place and the 18 m high statue of Lord Gometeshwara, considered one of the world’s tallest free-standing monolithic statues.
What we hadn’t bargained for was there would be 1001 granite steps that needed to be climbed to have a close-up view of this colossal magic three thousand feet above sea level on a hilltop. It would be an understatement to term it as an arduous climb.
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