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Did I burn the midnight oil just to hear this today? That I earn only if my husband's salary is not up to the mark? And once it is, I leave the job?
Did I burn the midnight oil just to hear this today? That I earn only if my husband’s salary is not up to the mark? And once it is, I leave the job?
A cool rainy evening. The entire family is enjoying pakoras with tea and discussing how the weather has changed over the last couple of days. Both our mothers had come to visit us.
While we were chatting and enjoying the delicacies, suddenly my mother-in-law exclaimed, “Your daughter is so lucky, as my son helps her in the daily household chores! My poor son, he must be getting so tired with all this work!”
And without even listening to her, my mother jumped up in a defensive mode, “So what? My daughter goes to office and also supports him in running the finances of the house. Your son ought to help her.”
This discussion ended here, at least for them, but it was still playing over and over again in my head.
At night, when everyone went off to bed, I asked my husband what he thought of the discussion that had happened in the evening. And his reply just shocked me. He said, “Once my annual salary gets above 40 lakhs, you can leave the job.”
Whhhhaaaaaatttttttt? He has the same thoughts?! And that disgusted me.
While I was studying, my parents always wanted me to study well and be independent. Did I burn the midnight oil just to hear this today? That I earn only if my husband’s salary is not up to the mark? And once it is, I leave the job?
That’s so foolish to even think of. I have a job because I love it. I love going to office everyday, I love solving client problems, and with all this I love working at home too. Trying all those new dishes on weekends, keeping the home spic and span, and playing with my kids. All this is a part of me. All this when knitted together makes me a whole.
I am not supporting anyone and neither am I asking for any help from my husband when he does the household chores. This home belongs to both of us. So both of us have an equal responsibility to keep it clean and do the daily chores. My husband doesn’t ‘help’ me when he does so. He equally loves his place and should want to look after it. What he does is for himself.
With all these thoughts running through my mind like a movie, I just couldn’t sleep that night. The next morning, I went to my mother in law and spoke to her, “This is your son’s home too. And it’s his choice to keep it as it looks today. He is certainly not ‘helping’ me.”
And after that I went to my mother and told her the same, “This is my home too. I like spending for it to keep it beautiful and investing together for our future. I am certainly not ‘supporting’ him.”
Both our moms got the message. And my husband too. Killing two birds with a stone!
Image courtesy YouTube
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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