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Why Should My Child Be Named After My Late Father-In-Law?

The issue arose with the last name of the child. Mihal insisted her husband’s second name should be added as he had passed away when Sonu was in college.

Sonu and Roopa were all excited to celebrate their tenth wedding anniversary. It was even more special as they had just welcomed their bundle of joy in their lives. It is been just a week. Sonu’s mother Mihal wanted to have the naming ceremony as well on the same day.

While the preparations went on with inviting guests, booking the best event management team, and the buffet menu for the night, Mihal concentrated on the little one’s name. According to their family astrologer, they agreed on the name Sonia. Sonu was from Kolkata while Roopa was from South India. They followed all the religious rituals from both sides of the family and hence because of that their marriage took place without much hassle.

The issue arose with the last name of the child. Mihal insisted her husband’s second name should be added as he had passed away when Sonu was in college.

“Sonu! Do you first realize how you became a father now?” Mihal initiated the conversation.

“Ma, Roopa’s second time IUI was successful.”


Sonu and Roopa looked at Mihal at once.

“Then Aunty Ji?”

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“For almost ten years you were childless. Do you know how sincerely I prayed to your father? It is because of my prayers and your dad’s blessing your second treatment, whatever you call it as was successful.”

Roopa couldn’t take those words. She had borne all the pain when Mihal’s words had been pricking her because they were childless. Now she was shocked to see her take the entire credit. It sounded as though Roopa hadn’t done anything for all this to happen. She stared at Sonu who was nodding to his mother’s words.

“Sure Ma. Dad’s full name was Amrit Jaswant Singh. So let us name her Sonia Jaswant,” Sonu replied gleefully. Her son’s acceptance made Mihal a proud mother and she smiled at the little one sleeping in the cradle.

“Can I say something?” Roopa interrupted.

Mihal knew there would be some negative comments from Roopa. Since Sonu was on her side she was confident there would be no change in the name.

Sonu nodded.

“Sonu, you know that my dad left us when I was just three years old. My mother brought me up single-handedly with so many struggles. Like Aunty Ji, I too prayed to my father. Why couldn’t it be my father’s blessing? Why shouldn’t I name our daughter Sonia Mithran? I am still Roopa Rajavel Mithran.”

She did hit the bull’s eye.

“I told you not to marry a girl from different background. Even after many years still she calls me ‘Aunty Ji’. If she had been one of us, we would have had a better rapport. She herself would have suggested keeping your dad’s name for your child.” Mihal began to pour the anger that she had stored in for years against Roopa.

Sonu stood still.

He was not sure which side to take on for now.

There are many such Roopas we come across. There’s no written rule that a child has to be named after its paternal side. A mother is the one who bears all the pain while carrying the baby and even after the delivery. When that is the case she is the only right person to name her child as she wishes.

Unfortunately not at all times Roopas can win. They have to keep their head low and listen to their in-laws. In worst cases, she is not even included in the discussion for the name. Sadly such incidents still happen.

A child is a new life that is to be welcomed as an additional member, the next generation of the family, and not tag the child to the paternal or the maternal side. The couple needs to stand as parents and understand that the child belongs to both of them.

Image source: shutterstock

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