“Eclectic, interesting…will fill you with hope and resolve!” – Pick up our new short story collection, Women.Mutiny
It may take a village to raise your children. However, it takes a little less to help them grow into happy kids. Here’s how you can do it!
Even before a mother conceives, her entire family starts dreaming about the child she will give birth to. Everyone starts building things up in their imagination. And finally, after going through the roller coaster-like journey for nine months, after the excitement of being a ‘mum-to-be,’ you are blessed with a new life. You now have a baby to hold and love.
But does the journey end here? No, this is where the challenge of parenting really begins. Every parent wants to give their best shot at it. They start giving their children healthy meals and start making arrangements for the required things. From finding the best playschool to doing everything they can, parents do all they can to keep their children happy. Most parents often follow the same track.
But do you know what really matters? Before a child steps into school, parents are their first teacher. They will follow everything – the way you talk, walk, eat and basically everything that you do every day. The children are all fast learners and will pick it all up very soon. So first and foremost, the biggest secret is to mark your own actions.
This is followed by good manners, culture and the behaviour you inculcate in your child. It is true what they say, culture comes from family. Only respecting elders at home or behaving politely with them isn’t enough. It is important to behave well with everyone you come across because your child learns to do the same.
The aura of your profession or your grand lifestyle must not impact your child at all. Explain to them at times the efforts it took to get here. Let your child realise the difference and importance of every profession in the community. You are supposed to behave well with everyone – whether it is your house-help, cleaner, guard, the subjiwala bhaiyya, absolutely anyone. Your kid needs to understand that self-respect is important for everyone – even if they don’t demand it.
Routine is yet another key to success. Once your child is accustomed to a daily routine, it will solve most of your problems. Plan the day for them and create a time-table with some balance. Remember – ‘All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy!’
Also, it is important to define the tolerance level of deviance in the time-table. Sometimes, you can also use some punishment to cut down some time of their favourite routine to help your child understand the importance of time.
Boost your child’s confidence. They say love your child the way the child is. And it is obviously the best idea. Don’t force your child to do what they aren’t interested in and if it is important, set the right motivation for them by counselling instead of making comparisons. Give them their space to try everything and you will see where their heart really lies.
Praise them for the things they’re good at. If they aren’t doing well in their studies, explain things to them logically and calmly. Tell them to practice more and assure them that they will do better next time. Believe in your children and that will help them grow their confidence.
Reward your child but remember it is also important to say ‘No’ at times. Never bribe your child or fix ‘deals’ with them in exchange for doing their homework or any other work. Do not fulfil each and every demand of theirs and learn to say ‘no,’ if it isn’t important.
In fact, if you reward them unexpectedly on their achievements or good work, it will boost their desire to work better. This will also stop them from being demanding and help them realise that they are being appreciated for their efforts. We all love to be praised for our efforts, don’t we?
It is also important to deal with the resistance of your child when it comes to accepting everything you ask them. Giving them your time might help. Right now, you may think that asking too much from them is not easy – they will react and might not follow. However, there are ways to deal with this resistance.
Start spending ‘only you and me’ time with them. Give them your full attention and keep away your mobiles, TV remotes, newspapers or any other distraction far away.
Talk to them about what they like and where they are facing problems. Try to be more of a friend than a parent. They need you around in whatever they do.
Play, laugh, crack jokes and let them know about some of your failures too and that everyone is not perfect. Praise them and fill them with good thoughts or memories before they go to bed. Ask them about their favourite part of the day. Let them express.
Tell them that they are the best ever gift you’ve had in your lifetime. They will start feeling ten feet tall and you will definitely see a happy and confident child growing in your arms!
Your part is done and the rest lies with them.
Picture credits: shutterstock
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views. Individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times. If you have a complementary or differing point of view, sign up and start sharing your views too!
I love the beauty with which words tangle with human emotions and start relating to
5 Lessons I Have Learned From Other Parents
6 Golden Rules For Raising Strong And Happy Kids
Raising A Happy Kid Is Easy With These 22 Simple Tips Every Parent Must Read
12 Reasons How Your Stress May Be Affecting Your Child And How To Deal With It
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!