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Kirti Kulhari’s recent account of separating from her husband shows how important it is to normalize divorce for women.
Actor Kirti Kulhari who has acted in films such as Shaitan, Pink, Mission Mangal and URI: The surgical strike, recently revealed her separation from her spouse, where she also added that her parents had mixed reactions to the divorce; what is worth noting is her statement that parents’ or in-laws’ opinions or those of the society should not be a reason to stay in a troubled marriage.
It is true that a divorce or separation can hugely impact you. The companions that you thought you had may suddenly disregard you. It’s anything but remarkable for divorced people to feel lost or uncertain of their place on the planet after their separation order has been finalised.
Since getting a separation implies that your marriage didn’t work, many end up believing that you did something incorrectly to make the relationship end. This isn’t necessarily true. For one, it takes two individuals to make a marriage. You may have given your everything, but it could have failed if the other individual wasn’t investing a lot of energy. Sometimes, marriages also fail for reasons beyond any individual’s fault.
Assuming you attempted to make the marriage work, you did all that you could do. A divorce simply implies that the one you thought was your accomplice for life isn’t your accomplice any longer, and that is perfectly fine.
Adapting to the social disgrace of separation can be difficult in a judgmental society like ours. Separations are likewise trashed on the grounds that “it influences the youngsters”. All things considered, knowing that their parents are in a miserable marriage is more dangerous for children.
Women like Kirti Kulhari who are bold enough to move out of a failing marriage merit our appreciation and not embarrassment. They did what numerous others are terrified of doing. Women continue to stay in harmful relationships since they are instructed to ‘change’ and compromise for the sake of the marriage. Once separated, women find themselves all alone at times, and the general public reasons that her life is ‘over’ or that she has no chance of finding love again.
These marks of disgrace act as impediments to a woman’s chance of breaking free from poisonous connections. This is our time to wipe away the marks of shame around divorce and empower women with the mindset that they can decide for themselves what the right choice is.
Top image is a still from the web series Criminal Justice featuring Kirti Kulhari
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