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My relationship with clothes is so dynamic and immersive that it reminds me of relationships I’ve had with people. They're rather similar, no?
My relationship with clothes is so dynamic and immersive that it reminds me of relationships I’ve had with people. They’re rather similar, no?
It was a lazy Sunday morning. I sat on the bed, sipping a hot cup of tea. I stared at the clothes in my wardrobe, contemplating what to wear for the dinner in the evening. The combination of colors, shapes and patterns seemed almost life-like to me.
The clothes which I saw seemed to be synonymous to relationships!
There were those shirts and dresses which were recently out of the store. They now adorned my wardrobe. They were worn a couple of times. They had accumulated multitude of compliments. It was almost like I gave life to them upon wearing!
They felt akin to those new relationships that are fresh, fun and exciting!
I look forward to occasions to get into a new dress, like a new friendship filled with interesting conversations. The fancy clothes are handled gently. They are not machine washed but dry cleaned. New relationships are a domain where we tread carefully too. We weigh our words sometimes so that the person isn’t offended. We often make their interests our interests in an effort to fit together, or sometimes just to strengthen the bond.
Then there are clothes which have seen a few seasons, have worn out their initial glamour. They don’t go to those once-in-a-while fancy parties. But, they are now comfortable as everyday wear. Just like those relationships, which are past the fun and exciting stage, where each word is not weighed but are way more in our comfort zone than before. Our day to day lives are bound to these relationships.
These relationships are as mundane or as exciting as our lives are, but nonetheless they are a constant, and they are there.
Sometimes that exclusive shirt never moves to become daily wear. So do some relationships.
Sometimes that dress which looked perfect in the trial room and came home with us, just does not look and feel right when we actually wear it the first time. Just like some people who seem super ‘our type’ in a social gathering or as acquaintances, but just don’t work right on a one-on-one.
Then there is the pile of clothes that I cozy up to at home. They are pajama wear, ‘working’ in the kitchen wear, or maybe even ‘sulking in a corner with a book’ wear. A large portion of this pile are clothes which have been loved so much since their ‘fancy’ days that I just could not let go.
That linen shirt with the shiny sequins! It is a misfit in the ‘pajama’ category. But it still gets slotted there because I just love the way it makes me feel!
And such are some relationships! The ones that fit in your corner like none other can – the corners which are not always bright, happy, fun or exciting. Relationships which have lasted the test of time and events without losing its shimmer.
I picked a brown shirt with golden tassels for the evening. Will it end up in that cozy pile? Only time shall tell!
Image source: a still from the film Pagglait
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Chetan Bhagat had no business slut shaming Uorfi Javed or any other woman. If he wants to 'guide' young men in the 'right direction' then he should take accountability for his words.
Chetan Bhagat, one of India’s bestselling authors, thought it was an ingenious idea to slut-shame Uorfi Javed, an Indian actress and influencer, at the Sahitya Aaj Tak literature festival.
“Phone has been a great distraction for the youth, especially the boys, spending hours just watching Instagram Reels. Everyone knows who Uorfi Javed is. What will you do with her photos? Is it coming in your exams or you will go for a job interview and tell the interviewer that you know all her outfits? On one side, there is a youth who is protecting our nation at Kargil and on another side, we have another youth who is seeing Uorfi Javed’s photos hiding in their blankets.”
Uorfi Javed responded with a video on her Instagram stories calling out Bhagat’s bluff. She shared the screenshots of his previous chat conversations with Ira Trivedi, author and yoga instructor, which came to light during the #MeToo movement.
While boys are taught to naturally own the space they enter, girls are taught to give up, to accommodate, to adjust since "it is their primary responsibility to keep families and relations together."
Yesterday, I was watching these 4 young girls around 16 – 17 years old play badminton. They were having fun, goofing around with all 4 of them equally involved in the game.
In some time two of their male friends joined them, and as part of round robin, the 2 boys replaced two of the girls. All good.
As the play continued, I started noticing a change in the way the game was being played. The shuttle was played most of the times between the two boys and there was a sense of competition and aggression brought in. The other 2 girls playing soon starting losing interest in the game as they hardly got any game time. Even if the shuttle came towards them, the boy in their team would move and play that shot. They soon moved to the sidelines as the boys continued to play.
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