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40s is the new 20s they say, and rightly so. Age is merely a number and even at 40, having crushes feels liberating and is like a therapy to your soul.
Let’s be very clear from the start (in case there is even an iota of doubt) that those of you looking for “aunty” kinda of advice – reboot. Others, mix yourself some G&T get set for confession time, because declaring crushes in your fabulous 40s, hmmmmm, that’s something to talk about in’t it? Like Bonnie Raitt crooned in her Grammy-winning number. It’s “man bites dog” as my journalism profession would tell me… in other words: NEWSWORTHY. Something to share with your soul sisters, who would get it. Completely.
Like this one time recently when me and my girlfriend had one of the best days chasing our collective heartthrob, the mega handsome Spanish golfing ace Rafael Cabrera-Bello. Ooh la la. Muy Bien!
The prestigious Hero Cup was underway at the magnificent DLF Golf Course, and it was one of those rare occasions when non-golfers are allowed to walk across the 18 spectacular holes. Sheer bliss. And a once in a lifetime opportunity, that we were not going to miss for anything! All along we ooh-ed and aah-ed like giggly school-girls.
I think Rafa noticed too; my girlfriend can vouch for that. My teen, however, was among the junior golfers volunteering as score keepers, and had this quizzical, almost scandalized look every time he passed us by. His one reaction, whenever I loudly declare my “love” for any of my innumerable crushes, is “Ok, so go , marry him!” Quite amusing, if you ask me. Poor little dear! If I’d listened to him I’d have myself a merry harem!
Brings me to the best thing about having crushes – that it’s not about “owning” or “achieving” but purely this wonderful feeling that flits about like a beautiful butterfly in your life and in fact introduces you to a part of yourself that loves, laughs, lives freely. This inner core that is still pure and uniquely individual, but buried deep within the stifling patina of duties, responsibilities, deadlines, milestones and this constant effort to fit in!
Do some dusting girl! For, despite being called a crush, it’s actually quite liberating. Not to be confused with things like an infatuation or one-sided love, lust, desperation, desire or anything cougar or raunchy. None of that! Just “your favourite distraction!”
The best part: it’s to do with the feeling and not the person per se, so NO expiry date! Whoa!
A heart that loves, lives. And love is so multi-dimensional, even a lifetime isn’t enough to truly discover each delightful facet. A crush being one such facet! And you can have multiple crushes going for you at one time.
Yup you can, certainly at 40! Isn’t it famously being called the “new 20s?” The gorgeous Heidi Klum declares that, and I am so totally going with her!
Right at this very moment, my crush chart is choc-a-bloc.
The interns include Ranveer Singh (he’s a dish in every movie..mooch or no mooch), Shahid Kapoor (donno how many times I’ve ogled at his adoring pic with Misha) and a small smattering of hunks – Kohli, Varun Dhawan, Duggabti, Siddhant Chaturvedi to name just a few.
The evergreens firmly ensconced in my heart are – SRK, my childhood sweetheart (I think I am the only one who found When Harry Met Sejal deeply romantic!); then the ultra calm and collected MSD: uff that guy just sends my heart spinning, every time.
My college sweetheart: Telugu actor – Venkatesh; Kapil Dev- I mean seeing him cry on National Television was one of the most heart breaking things (and meeting him at a golf club last year made me go weak in my knees), then Dharmendra: yes, yes, the years really don’t matter, he is the baap! Full-staap!! Oh! And how can I forget: Milind Somen: I think God broke the mould after hand-crafting that one!
There’s my “angrez” list too in case you were wondering if I am racist, starting with the lissome Bruce Lee to the brawny John Cena, Brock Lesner be damned. Brad was on my list too, till his infidelities, and now he’s in the pits! Matthew McConaughey, along with Channing Tatum, Daniel Craig and actor par excellence Javier Bardem are definitely drool-worthy. Plus Enrique Iglesia and the hot hot Adam Levine! Although it’s not all about glamour and tinsel. I have this whole other private list that starts with Obama (Oh Mama) and ends with David Beckham, Jamie Oliver and Federer!
Never quite liked Clooney and Gere that way though! But I think I had a wee bit of a crush on Raghuram Rajan as well; intelligence, you see, is very attractive. If it was looks I would have been drooling over Shashi Tharoor – man that guy is a looker.
There are many many many more…. but it’s not “truth day.”
Which brings me to this very interesting article that appeared a while ago: Women prefer good looks over intelligence and civility in men, finds US study.
Hey My God! As far as I am concerned, and I think I speak for a whole generation of women, the study proves only 2 things: either there are NO intelligent men left (quite believable in Covefefe Country) OR morons conducted the survey; either way its best we do not dignify the survey with a retort and leave the idiots be in their self-styled masochistic cocoons.
What women really want is – just men worthy of being called men! The Notebook nailed it with – “I have a crush on your mind, I fell for your personality, and your looks are just a big bonus.”
So then, take a sip of your G&T girls, munch on some bruschetta and crush on! Go ahead and believe me it’s the best therapy for your lovely soul! It gives a spring to your step, brings a smile on your face and this deeply satisfying feeling of being alive! What the heck? 40s are the new, improved 40s and I am totally loving it!
Image Source: YouTube/Sonata
Published short story writer-Feature Writer-Blogger-Author-Mother-Human-Work in Progress!! Gunjan Pant believes she learns her lessons mainly from travelling across India & the world, and by interacting with interesting people she meets read more...
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I wanted to scream with excitement that my daughter chose to write about her ambition and aspirations over everything else first. To me, this was one of those parenting 'win' moments.
My daughter turned eight years old in January, and among the various gifts she received from friends and family was an absolutely beautiful personal journal for self-growth. A few days ago, she was exploring the pages when she found a section for writing a letter to her future self. She found this intriguing and began jotting down her thoughts animatedly.
My curiosity piqued and she could sense it immediately. She assured me that she would show me the letter soon, and lo behold, she kept her word.
I glanced at her words, expecting to see a mention of her parents in the first sentence. But, to my utter delight, the first thing she had written about was her AMBITION. Yes, the caps here are intentional because I want to scream with excitement that my daughter chose to write about her ambition and aspirations over everything else first. To me, this was one of those parenting ‘win’ moments.
Uorfi Javed has been making waves through social media, and is often the target of trolls. So who and what exactly is this intriguing young woman?
Uorfi Javed (no relation to Javed Akhtar) is a name that crops up in my news feeds every now and again. It is usually because she got trolled for being in some or other ‘daring’ outfit and then posting those images on social media. If I were asked, I would not be able to name a single other reason why she is famous. I am told that she is an actor but I would have no frankly no clue about her body of work (pun wholly unintended).
So is Urfi Javed (or Uorfi Javed as she prefers) famous only for being famous? How does she impact the cause of feminism by permitting herself to be objectified, trolled, reviled?
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