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Adult babies. What are they, you say? Oh, just the husband and/or in laws who expect you to wait on them just because you are married into their family!
Almost all women in this country can relate to this and all men are going to hate this. But ninety out of hundred woman who get married in this country find themselves in this situation where they discover they have in fact adopted an adult baby in the face of marriage.
I faced the exact situation when I got married. It was a huge disappointment for me. But gradually I realised that almost all families have at least one adult baby. In most cases it is the son (husband Of the girl) whereas in some other extreme cases the in laws too behave like babies. In that case the poor newly married girl finds herself in the middle of mothering a family of adult babies. The biggest reason of depression in women working at home (I prefer to be addressed as WWH than SAHM).
Giving in to their demands not only saps the life out of you but also makes them more dependant. So dear woman, it is time to redefine your duties as wife and daughter in law.
Your duty is to make sure your family is well fed. It is not your duty to make the meals, bring it to the table, wait the table and clean afterwards. For every one. Even if you are sick.
It is your duty to keep the house clean. It is not your duty to pick up after every one.
It is your duty to take care of everyone. It is also their duty to take care of you. And the most important thing is it is also your duty to take care of You.
Teach your kids to participate in household chores. Teach them to make their own bed. Let them pack their school bags. Teach them how to tie their shoe laces, don’t do things for them. Don’t advise them unless they ask for. Let them fall and get get back on their feet.
And as per the already grown up babies, start small. Stop picking up after them. Be firm. It’s not about fighting but do not give in.
Sharing the load should be the new anthem of every family. Lead by example.
Image source: shutterstock
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Dear Women’s Web Community Member,
You may have wondered at our being on the quieter side during the last couple of months. Thank you for your patience, and we wanted to come back to you with a detailed note on what’s been happening at our end of things.
When we first began Women’s Web, as a blog from one woman’s desk along with a few like-minded souls, little could we have imagined the heights that it would soar to. Over the years, Women’s Web has published over 20000 stories (almost all by women), empowered countless women with the ideas, community and resources to chase their dreams, employed hundreds of women in core and project-based roles, and in the process, emerged as the OG women’s community in India. It has also inspired many others to build communities of a similar nature, all enabling women (and other-underrepresented groups) in their own ways.
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