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Gaining weight has always been considered a problem for women in a society that stereotypes them, but I've found that it is good for me in so many ways!
Gaining weight has always been considered a problem for women in a society that stereotypes them, but I’ve found that it is good for me in so many ways!
Weight has always been ‘the monster term’ for me.
When I was a kid, I was underweight and was continuously advised by everyone to eat properly. And I tried too, thinking that if it doesn’t happen now, it can never happen at all. Short and frail, I could go easily missing in a group. College was even more hopeless, I lost more weight.
It is when I got my first job that I slowly started gaining weight. And today, after 5 years, I am considered fat.
I reminded a few who pointed it out, that I am following the advice they gave me during my childhood and their smile quickly faded. I have been struggling to cross 45 kgs since very long time and now I have. The protruding collarbone that was pointed out by the neighbours, has now been covered amply. Though that is not the healthy weight for my age, it is quite correct for my height. And now, people are advising me to lose weight! And why? Because it is now my ‘marriageable age’ and hence I should look slender (read as beautiful).
I was shell-shocked when a cousin younger to me commented that was I bloating out, looking pityingly at my imaginary future husband in the air. I simply answered that I am the one that in future may carry a baby, not the hubby.
My weight has been everyone else’s business. As a kid, my diary looked very similar to ‘The Diary of a Young Girl’ by Anne Frank and after so many years now, my thoughts too reflect the same. There is constant bombardment about how to lose those beloved kilos over 45.
It took me an extreme effort to not lose my senses, in the least. Eventually, I developed the ‘don’t care’ attitude.
And so, to all the family members who worry about my weight and to all the ladies who are forced to regret it, here is my take on weight gain. There are ‘n’ number of things that these extra few kilos have given me:
Those extra kilos have given me an unimaginable amount of stamina. I don’t think these all would be possible if had bothered about anyone who counts my calories or took a look at the big morsel in my hand.
I am just a normal human being who is very proud to be capable of doing now, what I couldn’t do a few years ago. Today, I feel if there was no one around to remind me often that I am imperfect, I could have achieved all those things long ago and I would have been a lot more optimistic and a tad less of a badass.
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I am an egalitarian and strive to see it around me as much as possible. I am an avid reader, a passionate writer and an ardent fan of English language. I like to observe things read more...
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"There is a story and a vision which makes us gravitate towards cinema. Even as we worked as assistants on ads, we realised that cinema was our true calling," say Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh Raseen.
The Railway Men. Mili. Cuttputli. The Diplomat. Bade Miyan Chote Miyan. And more…
Let me introduce to you the talented designer duo who have worked on these, and can be considered today’s upcoming costume designers for the screen. Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh.
Having studied at NIFT, Gunpreet Kaur Mann sent her portfolio out to several designers. Her first gig was as an assistant stylist with Manoshi and Rushi, who also happen to be a designer duo. She worked on an ad film starring Saif Ali Khan and eventually landed a full time job with designer Vikram Phadnis. Years of experience as assistant costume designer followed, which eventually led her to getting a break.
A ‘thank you’ makes a lot of difference in the way any woman in your life sees herself in your eyes. It might even mean the world to her.
I have not received any appreciation in the past. Probably never will. This is the experience of ample women across the globe. The expectation to be thanked for all the sacrifices she makes to keep others happy has faded. Yet the urge to hear few words of acknowledgement always lingers.
There is never a day when she pushes off her own burdens. She knows not to give up on people she loves. Women in general, are givers by nature and hence, give without asking anything in return. They have been the care givers and lovers since centuries however receive no appreciation.
It will mean the world to your mother if you answer her calls. If your sister seems lost give her a hug and assure her about her strengths. Tomorrow, there might come a day when you would have to make your daughter feel empowered with few words of wisdom every now and then. For the children to feel wanted and loved, you must be able to spare some quality time with your wife and be present in the moment.
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