I have a daughter and I have blogged earlier on what are the advantages of having a daughter and how I am being told to have a second child. Now, this second child has to definitely be a boy….I HAVE to ensure it okie! Othewise, do you know what will happen?
– There is will no one to carry forward RD’s family’s name
– Who will take care of us in our old age?
– Whom will RD relate to?
– The family needs to be ‘complete’ (hum do, hamare do, ek ladki, ek ladka)
– There will be someone to light our prye when we die, phew!
– Someone has to be there to take care of R when she gets married and goes away…who will stand for the ‘mama stanam’ when her child is getting his thread ceremony done or getting married?
– There has to be at least one happy occasion in the house before R’s marriage na, that’s the son’s thread ceremony!
– Who will R tie ‘rakhi’ to and who will protect her in her teenage years? Which is why I should not delay having a second child so that the age difference is not much
– R can stay back late nights when she grows up so that her brother can take care of her and bring her back from wherever she is
blah blah blah blah…Uff I’ve seriously had enough!!!
To the many people who are so worried here are my answers
– R carries her father’s family’s name as much as the hypothetical son that I will carry in future, just as I carry my parent’s name as much as my brother
– We need to take care of ourselves at our old age. We need to plan our finances whether or note we have a son or a daughter and BTW..I am serious about the thought of putting money in an old age home and staying there when my child(ren) don’t need my self
– RD can relate to his daughter, he can relate to playing rough with her, he can relate to making her sporty, yes, he can do that with a girl child!!
– The family is already complete and if I have another child who is a girl, it’s going to be equally complete – thank you so much for your concern on completed families!
– My daughter is hale and hearty and am sure will be capable enough to light the prye, thank you so much!
– Errr..We hope to educate R so that she can definitely take care of herself..her marriage or non-marriage is her choice..and for ‘mama stanam’ for her kids..she has enough cousins and friends even at the age of three, whom she looks upon as brothers
– Yaa, right..I would rather NOT have any such happy occasions, if they are meant to waste 1000s of rupees inviting people you can’t even relate to and all they do is comment!
– R can tie ‘rakhi’ to who ever is her sibling and to her cousins and friends. And I plan to make her strong enough to take care of herself!
– R can stay back late nights even if I don’t have a second child, because my parents brought me up in such a way that I never needed my elder brother to come and ‘pick me up’ and I plan to make R strong and independent enough to handle herself and when needed, her younger sibling if any
Any more other questions?
R’s Mom is a working mother in Mumbai trying to balance work, home and baby. Learning the ropes of new motherhood and wanting to spend more time with baby. Running to catch up with read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, indivisual posts do not necessarily represent the platofrom's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Falling in love, marriage, a hidden secret, divorce. Despite all this, Vinita noticed her life was full of love that came in various unexpected shades!
“Aap jinke kareeb hotey hain, woh badey kush naseeb hotey hain…”
Just as Vinita was settling down into the cab seat, the driver put on music and the song started to play. It took her back immediately to that evening ten years ago, when Gautam had sung that very same song to her on the first evening they had met. She could remember every single detail of that evening so very clearly.
Neena Gupta shares her terrifying childhood experiences of being molested - like most assault survivors who often go to great measures to minimise these incidents by remaining silent, she was scared to tell her parents.
Neena Gupta shares her terrifying childhood experiences of being molested – like most assault survivors who often go to great measures to minimise these incidents by remaining silent, she was scared to tell her parents.
Trigger warning: This deals with child sexual abuse and may be triggering for survivors.
I refuse to be put at a 'disadvantage' just because I'm the parent of a girl. It is time we looked differently at marriage and its traditions.
I refuse to be put at a ‘disadvantage’ just because I’m the parent of a girl. It is time we looked differently at marriage and its traditions.
As an “Indian” mother of a daughter I “must” start thinking about my daughter’s marriage since the birth of my child. When the news of a girl child being born is given in Indian society – the image of lakhs of money given as gift to groom’s family comes to mind, maybe kilos of gold of donation and of course the vidaai ceremony of the daughter who is just a day old in your hands… but is this how it should be in a modern society?
Soon Anjali gave birth to two girls and one boy. Just as she slipped into a blessed, healing sleep, she heard: “Thank god, ek beta hai. Teen ladkiyan kaise palti yeh bechari!”
Anjali had given her final year exams of BA when she got married to Anmol. After bagging 3rd position in college, she moved back to Ludhiana with her husband. Her husband had a mediocre lifestyle and hailed from a middle-class background. Anjali was wise enough to make the best use of any resources, and gave a new look to the entire house without spending anything much. Her neighbours always praised her for managing the household expenses so well and hence, leading a comfortable lifestyle.