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A lot of sexist behaviour is camouflaged as 'just joking'. It's time we called it for what it is!
A lot of sexist behaviour is camouflaged as ‘just joking’. It’s time we called it for what it is!
Today I had posted on my timeline about how “Jacqueline Fernandez’s remix does one thing though – makes you count ‘Ek Do Teen’ till you go running to Madhuri’s Ek Do Teen for succour and that epic isn’t copyable.”
We girl pals on FB were indulging in gentle banter remarking that sadly, Jacqueline who is brave enough to be called foolhardy, ends up as a caricature thanks to the dance director and director’s ‘visions’. Hence the dance-director should bear the brunt too.
We also agreed that some songs are unbeatable because the ladies featured in them bring their innate grace to the supposed item/meat numbers.
And then, an irrelevant, sexual comment was dropped by one of the male pals. About how men stop at the bosom while we women worry about ribcage, dress etc.
For a moment I was stunned. Somehow this felt uncalled for. And this was not the first time this man had comment-bombed (for lack of a better word) and indulged in sexual innuendos. Sadly, the man is in his 50s with a growing son. So some decorum was expected.
Was I to ignore this comment hoping that someday he might realize that it isn’t kosher?
How often haven’t we laughed at those WhatsApp forwards which declared our husbands to be lazy couch potatoes who were so challenged that they needed to be directed to the kitchen counters by our able hands and sagely countenances?
But my irritation lingered on, like a festering wound.
I then unfriended the man.
Am I overreacting? Am I being a prude?
Maybe yes to both. But sometimes you have to walk the talk.
You have to say ‘No-More! This isn’t acceptable!’
And the first step begins with me.
Right now, the man might be calling me unmentionable names at my idiocy and pricey behaviour.
But I rest easy.
Because I did do right!
Anupama Jain is the author of: * ’Kings Saviours & Scoundrels -Timeless Tales from Katha Sarita Sagara’, listed as one of the best books of 2022 by @Wordsopedia. Rooted in the traditional storytelling of Indian legends, warriors, read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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