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Serious about ending rape in India? Don't feel smug that you are not a rapist. Rape culture arises from how society views the role of women
Blogger Arundhati Venkatesh describes herself as a kid-lit enthusiast, an observer of life and people, a feminist, a minimalist and a compulsive maker of lists! An engineer by degree, and an IT professional in her previous life, she is now an aspiring writer. Arundhati works for an NGO.
We’ve heard politicians tell us a woman who has been raped is better off dead. As if that wasn’t enough, we had a woman scientist say she shouldn’t have resisted rape. So effectively, women are being told what to do when being raped – ‘submit, don’t protest’ – and that life is not worth living after. And of course, we’ve always been told how to dress, talk, laugh (or not).
That’s not all. The reaction from the common man is telling. He condemns rape and expresses solidarity with women. He asks us to look at this as an isolated incident – “it is not ‘some men’, just these six rapists, no one else”. He tells us not to get “irrational”, to control our anger – “men are holding candles and protesting, men are angry too. So women, don’t get any angrier.” So now we have men getting defensive and telling us how angry we can get.
Yes, we are angry. We are angry because we see ourselves in her. It is not just one woman’s story. Or that of six men. We see how the politicians, the police, the judiciary, the media, the movie industry, the man on the street, the woman… all contribute to the drama that leads to this. Rape does not occur in a vacuum. To believe that would be fooling ourselves and absolving ourselves of all responsibility.
Separating rape from all other injustice against women really angers me – people occupying moral high ground because they wouldn’t rape anyone. Get off that pedestal you’ve put yourself on.
It’s not just those six criminals who are responsible. It is also those who walked away. And the police personnel. And the politicians who wait for the noise to die down. And it is not just this one rape, but every single rape.
And it is not just rape. It is every act of abuse. It is every disrespectful and stereotypical statement uttered. It is every opinion and judgment – even those left unsaid.
We are all aiders and abettors, or have been at some point. Let’s accept it and do something about it at least now.
People, please stop telling women what to do. Think about what you (men and women) need to do.
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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