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When I entered the Engineering College, there were very few girls, and we were told: “You’d better prove that you’re good at it, otherwise, you’ll never receive offers for good jobs.”
When I was a kid, I used to hear so many times – that girls, have to prove everywhere that they are good enough!
And yes! I had to keep proving myself at every stage. When I received full marks in my Board exams in Mathematics, so many people said:
“Ah! A girl with full marks in Mathematics! Awesome!”
Back then, when I entered the Engineering College, there were very few girls, and we were told:
“You’d better prove that you’re good at it, otherwise, you’ll never receive offers for good jobs.”
And, as usual, all of us set out to prove ourselves.
It’s another story that all the girls in my batch did wonderfully well in their careers. It’s another story that I ended up with 6-7 wonderful job offers after I cleared my final year.
In the job field, there were hardly any women, and the cycle to prove started again, though by now, the desire to prove had started taking its toll.
My husband never said anything, but the other women around me (which includes a few relatives and friends too) would often say:
“Well, you are good in your work; but can you really take care of your home properly if you are in such a high-profile job?”
I often wondered why it was the women who were pointing fingers at me as if being in a high-profile job was a crime!
Similarly, in my workplace, people wouldn’t let me do difficult tasks, thinking that I couldn’t handle them. I would make it a point to ensure that it’s I who does that so-called “difficult task!”
Well, slowly things started changing. There were so many women working.
When I went to my Engineering College to impart one of the motivational lectures, I was happy to see that the ratio of girls in Engineering College had risen to 1% in our times to 40%, and I was really ecstatic…till…
Well, when I returned home, I heard my daughter ask, “Why does my Maths sir think that girls can’t be good at Mathematics?”
I sadly realised that the cycle of proving is not going to stop. At least, not so soon…
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Neelam Saxena Chandra is an Engineering graduate from VNIT and has done her Post Graduation Diploma in IM&HRD and also in Finance. She has completed a summer course in Finance from London School of read more...
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UP Boards Topper Prachi Nigam was trolled on social media for her facial hair; our obsession with appearance is harsh on young minds.
Prachi Nigam’s photo has been doing the rounds on social media for the right reasons. Well, scratch that- I wish the above statement were true. This 15-year-old girl should ideally be revelling in her spectacular achievement of scoring a whopping 98.05% and topping her tenth-grade boards. But oddly enough, along with her marks, it’s something else that garners more attention – her facial hair.
While the trolls are driving themselves giddy by mocking this girl who hasn’t even completed her school yet, the ones who are taking her side are going one step ahead – they are sharing her photoshopped pictures, sans the facial hair, looking nothing less than a celebrity with captions saying – “Prachi Nigam, ten years later”.
Doctors have already diagnosed her with PCOD in their comments, based on photographic evidence. While we have names for people shamed for their weight – body shaming, for their skin colour- racism, for their age- age shaming, for being a female- sexism, this category of shaming where one faces criticism for their appearance has no name. With that, it also has zero shame attached to it.
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