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We're taught what and how to wear, how to make ourselves presentable and what not! And given our upbringing, we never even question such things.
They say that freedom comes when you stop caring about what people think of you. But in my opinion, it’s not always the case. We girls are taught to maintain our posture right from childhood. We’re taught what and how to wear, how to make ourselves presentable and what not! And given our upbringing, we never even question such things as we never thought of it in that way. It’s like our life has been set like that by default.
It’s very common for a girl to ask for permission from her father or her husband before setting foot outside the home. And we have a common perspective, that is like ‘it’s for the girl’s safety and it’s not controlling’.
Yes, I agree to tell your family about your whereabouts isn’t called being controlled. But what about the time when the same people who claim to care about your happiness don’t let you go to a certain place just because they think it’s not okay for a girl?
What about when most girls are banned from studying further and are asked to learn the house chores because if we get married and don’t know how to cook, our parents would be ashamed of us?
Why is it common for people to tell us, girls, to get married when we want to enjoy ourselves, our lives, and establish our empire, that too on our own? Why can’t I dress as I like or as I feel comfortable? Why do I have to be the one to be cautious of my tone or my sitting posture anywhere I go? Why can’t I laugh as loud as I want, or why can’t I skip learning the recipes and opt for the career I want for myself? What am I asking much that society or parents can’t afford?
One moment people be like demanding equality for both boys and girls, and the next moment they will be asking their daughter to stay at home when their son is enjoying outside. We want equity. We want society to accept that we girls aren’t as fragile as we are thought to be. For me, Freedom is like that golden bird whom I have heard about in the stories but had never seen. The tale of Freedom is never a good or happy thing for girls, and the reason is it is equipped with the opinions and thoughts of others who controlled them.
Whenever I decided to go out with my friends, I have to beg my father but just because I am a girl, and I cannot go outside to chill with my buddies. And even if I wanted to go, then I have to bring my brother with me. This thing forces me to think that why my Freedom is depending upon my brother? Why do I have to take someone with me if I want to go shopping or outing every time?
After completing my graduation, I understand that I cannot do anything totally at my will, whether right or wrong. Even in today’s era, I have been allowed to do the job outside, and there are certain limitations to it. As a girl, I know that freedom or rights are not absolute because some people target me just because I am a girl. Being born a girl and doing things that I like to do is not as easy as eating bread with butter. And at every stage of my life till today, I have faced some uncomfortable situations that always made me think that I would have been better if I was born as a boy.
I remember I had a conversation with my father and mother, and I was so excited to share my job planning with them back then. When I share my opinion with them, I don’t know why, but I feel that they compare me to other girls who finished their studies and got married.
At first, they were totally against my job; they didn’t even allow me to attend interviews. But after 2 or 3 months, I decided that this is not the life I have ever imagined living. No matter If they are my family, no one has the right to keep me in a cage. I have the right to do anything in my life according to my way.
Everyone, irrespective of their gender, goes through different phases in their life. School, college, work, then marriage and so on. After each phase, a new opportunity is waiting for us to lead us to a new phase of our life. Who doesn’t have a dream, who doesn’t want to live a life at their will! After completion of my graduation, I decided to go for the job that I wanted to do.
Then, I started to prepare for interviews and finally cleared one interview and got a job as a Technical Content Writer. When you entered corporate life, you learn new things, you develop yourself to perform better, and as a girl, I don’t think there is anything wrong with that. So, this is the first achievement I have got. Now am doing my job greatly without any limitations and worries.
I think the most precious right for a girl or woman is freedom. Freedom is a wing that allows us to do whatever we want to, but if we have complete freedom, we will inevitably get in the way of the freedom of others. So, unless someone lives in a cave or someone lives a life a girl is being forced to live, there is no complete freedom for anyone.
As a girl, I think that all women and girls need freedom or opportunity to create, improve the sick mentality of people, and show them that we are also strong enough to do other things and live our lives in our ways. Unfortunately, it isn’t feasible for us to appreciate the total opportunity. There should be some sensible limitations on our opportunity to permit others to partake in their privileges and opportunity.
Hurdles will always be there till the time our society doesn’t change its mind. Being a girl or woman can’t stop you from dreaming or leading a life of your own. Break your barriers and fly high to live your life.
Image Source: ChrisBoswell from Getty Images via Canva Pro
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Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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Did the creators of Masaba Masaba just wake up one morning, go to the sets and decide to create something absolutely random without putting any thought into it?
Anyone who knows about Neena Gupta’s backstory would say that she is a boss lady, a badass woman, and the very definition of a feminist. I would agree with them all.
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The second season of Masaba Masaba (2020-2022) made me feel as if both Neena Gupta and her daughter Masaba have gotten typecast when it comes to the roles they play on screen. What’s more is that the directors who cast them have stopped putting in any effort to challenge the actors, or to make them deliver their dialogues differently.
People have relationships without marriages. People cheat. People break up all the time. Just because two people followed some rituals does not make them more adept at tolerating each other for life.
Why is that our society defines a woman’s success by her marital status? Is it an achievement to get married or remain married? Is it anybody’s business? Are people’s lives so hollow that they need someone’s broken marriage to feel good about themselves?
A couple of months ago, I came across an article titled, “Shweta Tiwari married for the third time.” When I read through it, the article went on to clarify that the picture making news was one her one of her shows, in which she is all set to marry her co-star. She is not getting married in real life.
Fair enough. But why did the publication use such a clickbait title that was so misleading? I guess the thought of a woman marrying thrice made an exciting news for them and their potential readers who might click through.