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You go to the doctor, expecting her to use science to cure you. Then comes the curveball. No wonder the author is letting sarcasm carry her onwards!
You go to the gynaecologist, expecting her to help your PCOD. Why don’t more doctors actually treat this disorder scientifically?
I want to thank you, sincerely, for changing my life. I was a lost soul who used to believe in Science but then, you showed me the way. This is a small note of gratitude from a 32-year-old woman, who came to you at various points of her life with chronic Poly-Cystic Ovaries Disorder (PCOD), for whom you figured out the best solution ever!
I still remember the first day I walked into your clinic. I was in my mid-20s at the time. You were so smart, you declared my issues with excess body weight, since I was so young, must be simply from eating junk food! The fact that I hardly ate junk food didn’t matter, of course!
Your genius in intuitively understanding the possible reasons behind my weight issues left me in awe! You explained that the solution to my problem was to lose weight and reduce stress levels. (Thin girls and women who have PCOD are just exceptions or are lying, are they?)
You then asked me if I was stressed and I told you about my life-long battle with depression. You responded with absolute conviction, that if I practiced yoga regularly, my depression will vanish! You made me realise that great men, like Baba Ramdev, were right all along! Yoga is a magical pill that can cure anything and everything (even COVID-19!). I have no idea why we have mental health professionals in this country! Mental Health is a sham, all you need are Willpower and Yoga!
But what actually stayed with me and gave me ‘hope’ over the years, is your assurance that PCOD is a temporary problem. You said, again with absolute conviction, that once I get married, this will cease to be an issue!
I was so dumbstruck because the solution was right under my nose! Haven’t our parents and society told us, right from our teenage years (or even childhood), that marriage is the solution to all problems in life?!
It’s not every day that one finds a gynaecologist like you. The conviction you have in your solutions inspires me, day in, day out. Whenever I see a woman struggling with PCOD, I conclude that she is a woman of weak mind. I mean, if she had willpower, she would have exercised, lost weight, and resolved the issue in a few months, right? She, and only she, can be ‘blamed’ for PCOD. I body shame her because that will inspire her to lose weight.
People like you are the real desh bhakts and the custodians of our Great Indian Culture. Body-shaming is great for our economy! If all women are of similar weight, brands can create same size clothing in bulk. That will save a lot of resources and energy!
Thank you for making me understand how the Indian Society has always been scientific. Now I understand why everyone around me has been pressuring me to get married! Thank you for being my guiding light. I will find a groom soon and send you my wedding invitation.
Photo by Sharath G. from Pexels
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Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
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Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
Darlings makes some excellent points about domestic violence . For such a movie to not follow through with a resolution that won't be problematic, is disappointing.
I watched Darlings last weekend, staying on top of its release on Netflix. It was a long-awaited respite from the recent flicks. I wanted badly to jump into its praise and will praise it, for something has to be said for the powerhouse performances it is packed with. But I will not be able to in a way that I really had wanted to.
I wanted to say that this is a must-watch on domestic violence that I stand behind and a needed and nuanced social portrayal. But unfortunately, I can’t. For I found Darlings to be deeply problematic when it comes to the portrayal of domestic violence and how that should be dealt with.
Before we rush to the ‘you must be having a problem because a man was hit’ or ‘much worse happens to women’ conclusions, that is not what my issue is. I have seen the praises and criticisms, and the criticisms of criticisms. I know, from having had close associations with non-profits and activists who fight domestic violence not just in India but globally, that much worse happens to women. I have written a book with case studies and statistics on that. Neither do I have any moral qualms around violence getting tackled with violence (that will be another post some day).