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While some woman may enjoy being called 'sexy,' I don't. It makes me feel uncomfortable. Here are a few more reasons why I don't like it.
While some woman may enjoy being called ‘sexy,’ I don’t. It makes me feel uncomfortable. Here are a few more reasons why I don’t like it.
Do you ever compliment anyone as ‘hot’ or ‘sexy’? When you do so, do you think they are desirable or worthy of attracting, presumably, the opposite gender? While many women enjoy the compliments, there are a bunch of us who get offended by the term!
Want to know why?
It is all about your perception and your mind. When people see Nora Fatehi dancing on screen, some see desire, some see art. How can she be so flexible? Several others giggle every time they see her performing. So, you see it’s not all about our bodily desires! There’s a world beyond that.
Yes, I do not like being complimented as ‘sexy,’ because it reduces me to a mere object – plastic or inanimate object. While I consider myself very much alive, and full of emotions, it is difficult for me to face a person, who doesn’t recognize my emotions or intellect.
Why do they assume that a woman must be obliged or delighted about the fact that she is capable of attracting someone physically towards her? She might be interested in connecting with someone intellectually or emotionally or through art!
Why do they assume that women are ‘asking for it’ if they are wearing a short dress in their profile pictures? There can be a hundred reasons for a woman to pick a dress or to pose for a picture!
Many women perceive themselves as independent thinkers, leaders, change makers, artists, creators, author or poets. And many of us, don’t enjoy being complimented ‘hot’ or ‘sexy.’ It hurts our emotions or self-esteem that our creative capabilities have been reduced to zero in a go!
What we enjoy is compliments about our work, sense of humour, IQ levels, and our analytical skills among others. This list is endless only if one has the eye or desire to look for it!
First published here.
Picture credits: Still from Bollywood movie Piku
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The female protagonists in Nagesh Kukunoor's movies are strong, independent and inspiring women. They aren't damsels in distress waiting for men to come to their rescue.
Bollywood has been experimenting with the genre of Feminism for quite some time now. The film industry is gradually becoming more and more progressive and giving women the recognition they deserve.
Filmmaker Nagesh Kukunoor had started implementing the element of gender equality in his movies long before it became a ‘trend’. Moreover, the theme is so subtly embedded in his narratives, that it appears natural rather than forced.
Here, I’d like to explore how women not only appear in prominent roles in Kukunoor’s movies, but also epitomise strength and courage.
Noelle Page from The Other Side of Midnight, and Subbu from Aaranya Kandam, tell young women that "it's a man’s world, but you still have the power to bend it your way."
Noelle Page from The Other Side of Midnight, and Subbu from Aaranya Kandam, tell young women that “it’s a man’s world, but you still have the power to bend it your way.”
Feminism. The practically infamous F word that makes people uncomfortable within just seconds. Not just men, but everyone who has internalized patriarchy in general feels so threatened, that they do not even want to listen.
There are women who spend their whole lives trying to make something of themselves, standing up for themselves and their rights. But no matter how hard they try, there’s still an underlying tone of ‘rebellion’ in this progress and it is brushed off as being ‘arrogant’.
Do we do things for the sake of it? Why do women always put themselves through a life full of discomfort? Isn't it easier to be simple and comfortable?
Do we do things for the sake of it? Why do women always put themselves through a life full of discomfort? Isn’t it easier to be simple and comfortable?
From time immemorial, women have been struggling for mere acknowledgement of existence of the fairer sex by the superior. And this struggle and journey for identity seems to have become eternal now! The reason is that women themselves make their lives complicated by continuing to participate in most inconvenient ways of living; by choice or otherwise. Be it about wearing sheen, under-knee length dresses in winters, or wearing high-heels for long, uneven walks, or putting layers of artificial beauty products, or carrying heavy jewellery on the most delicate body parts; the ultimate goal is to blindly follow a trend in the name of fashion, which is meant more to please the eyes of others than to bring comfort to themselves.
The lack of acknowledgement of our identities can be judged from the fact that women still need to be shy and inexpressive about something that is as common as menstruation. 50% of population suffers through ‘it’ every month, from an age as young as just entering into ‘teen’ (varying according to geographical and tropical changes) to an age as old as almost leaving youth and virility far behind. We still need to carry the whole purse to washrooms while all we need is the napkin. We still have to be cautious while buying or disposing those napkins so that no one catches us doing it; as if this is some heinous crime. We still look for lame excuses on raising leaves in work places or being unable to attend any event, when the actual reason circles around those painful days of the month. Ironically, we are not surprised to see these bad incumbent social practices in matters so sophisticated, but we do blabber about women empowerment, equality and freedom in other high notch affairs.
We still have to be cautious while buying or disposing those napkins so no one catches us doing it; as if this is some heinous crime.Read Full Article
We still have to be cautious while buying or disposing those napkins so no one catches us doing it; as if this is some heinous crime.
Our idea of sex and sexuality is completely messed up. Mostly because culturally women 'give' sex and men 'take' sex. This makes everything about the male gaze.
Our idea of sex and sexuality is completely messed up. Mostly because culturally women ‘give’ sex and men ‘take’ sex. This makes everything about the male gaze.
Sex is equal to women because men are the buyers. Is it an exaggeration? I think not!
The imagery and language puts the woman’s body front and center. Because men are the buyers, and sex is the commodity, of which the woman is the item.