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We would like our kids to learn things and become independent, but at the same time, we don't want them to grow up too fast, and slip through our fingers too early!
We would like our kids to learn things and become independent, but at the same time, we don’t want them to grow up too fast, and slip through our fingers too early!
“Mom, I will do it myself. Don’t help me,” she repeated assertively.
Before I could debate any further, she exclaimed in an unparalleled state of excitement.
” I did it, Mom! I did it all by myself.”
She had indeed done it. My 4-year-old had donned her night suit all by herself with zilch assistance from me and it was a huge accomplishment for her evidently. But, why was I not able to match the ecstasy and feeling of contentment of my little one? Why was my heart sinking as if I was being pulled away from a string that I was desperately trying to cling to?
We locked each other in a warm cuddle and a silent tear trickled down my cheek. Even though I tried to hold back, it couldn’t escape the keen eye of a child.
“Why are you crying Mom?” she asked concerned.
“Nothing sweetheart. I don’t want you to grow up so soon. Stay this small for a while,” I responded in a choked voice.
“But yesterday you said that you want me to grow up soon so that I can clean my bum on my own after pooping.”
Hearing this retort from my daughter totally left me in splits. I couldn’t stop laughing because I was actually guilty of making that comment the previous day when I was bone-tired. But, even though unintended humour had transformed the mood of the moment, realisation had already hit me hard.
It hit me that with every milestone, my child is taking a giant leap towards independence. It hit me that the clock is ticking rapidly and she is growing up fast; too fast for my liking. It hit me that this phase will never come back and I may be having little time remaining to make the most of it.
Caught up in the daily grind of our lives, at times we forget to pause and savour the seemingly quotidian moments. And more often than not, it is our children who remind us inadvertently to breathe, reflect and soak it up to the fullest.
All this impels me to puzzle over the conundrum that is parenting. I randomly keep swinging between conflicting thoughts and oft-times end up contradicting my own statements.
But, therein lies the beauty of this role I guess. Because, the more experience I gain as a parent, the more I realise how much is left to be discovered about it. The more I understand parenting, the more I recognise what I don’t understand about it. It’s indeterminate, yet so defined. It’s simple, yet so perplexing. It drains and fulfills. It agitates as well as soothes.
And while I am all emotional as I end this piece, my daughter has woken up and is refusing to go back to sleep in the middle of the night. This, when I have a submission pending and can’t wait to crash on the bed after turning it in. There goes the intense mush out of the window!
A version of this was first published here.
Image source: unsplash
Multiple award winning blogger, influencer, author, multi-faceted entrepreneur, creative writing mentor, choreographer, social activist and a wanderer at heart read more...
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Does Ranbir Kapoor expressing his preferences about Alia using lipstick really make him a toxic husband?
Sometime back, a video of Alia Bhatt with Vogue went viral where she shares her go-to make-up routine and her unique way to apply lipstick. It went viral not for the quirkiness but because she said that after applying the lipstick, she “rubs it off” because her then boyfriend and now husband – Ranbir Kapoor likes her natural lip colour and asks her to “wipe it off”, whenever they are out on a date night.
Netizens had gone crazy over this video, calling RK toxic and not respecting AB’s choice to wear makeup. I saw the video a couple of times to understand the reason behind the uproar but I failed to understand it. I read many comments and saw people saying that asking your partner or dictating terms on how they should wear makeup is a major sign to leave the person.
Modesty or humility is viewed as the hallmark of a well-brought-up girl, which makes it hard for us to be open to any real compliments without feeling like an imposter.
Why is accepting that compliment so hard?
Colleagues: Have you lost weight? You look good!
She (who has spent months doing Keto and weights): It’s the dress that’s making me look thinner!
Guests: Your house is so beautiful and neat!
She (who spent the last five hours mopping and polishing): It could be tidier; there is just so much dust.
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