If you are a professional in an emerging industry, like gaming, data science, cloud computing, digital marketing etc., that has promising career opportunities, this is your chance to be featured in #CareerKiPaathshaala. Fill up this form today!
We would like our kids to learn things and become independent, but at the same time, we don't want them to grow up too fast, and slip through our fingers too early!
We would like our kids to learn things and become independent, but at the same time, we don’t want them to grow up too fast, and slip through our fingers too early!
“Mom, I will do it myself. Don’t help me,” she repeated assertively.
Before I could debate any further, she exclaimed in an unparalleled state of excitement.
” I did it, Mom! I did it all by myself.”
She had indeed done it. My 4-year-old had donned her night suit all by herself with zilch assistance from me and it was a huge accomplishment for her evidently. But, why was I not able to match the ecstasy and feeling of contentment of my little one? Why was my heart sinking as if I was being pulled away from a string that I was desperately trying to cling to?
We locked each other in a warm cuddle and a silent tear trickled down my cheek. Even though I tried to hold back, it couldn’t escape the keen eye of a child.
“Why are you crying Mom?” she asked concerned.
“Nothing sweetheart. I don’t want you to grow up so soon. Stay this small for a while,” I responded in a choked voice.
“But yesterday you said that you want me to grow up soon so that I can clean my bum on my own after pooping.”
Hearing this retort from my daughter totally left me in splits. I couldn’t stop laughing because I was actually guilty of making that comment the previous day when I was bone-tired. But, even though unintended humour had transformed the mood of the moment, realisation had already hit me hard.
It hit me that with every milestone, my child is taking a giant leap towards independence. It hit me that the clock is ticking rapidly and she is growing up fast; too fast for my liking. It hit me that this phase will never come back and I may be having little time remaining to make the most of it.
Caught up in the daily grind of our lives, at times we forget to pause and savour the seemingly quotidian moments. And more often than not, it is our children who remind us inadvertently to breathe, reflect and soak it up to the fullest.
All this impels me to puzzle over the conundrum that is parenting. I randomly keep swinging between conflicting thoughts and oft-times end up contradicting my own statements.
But, therein lies the beauty of this role I guess. Because, the more experience I gain as a parent, the more I realise how much is left to be discovered about it. The more I understand parenting, the more I recognise what I don’t understand about it. It’s indeterminate, yet so defined. It’s simple, yet so perplexing. It drains and fulfills. It agitates as well as soothes.
And while I am all emotional as I end this piece, my daughter has woken up and is refusing to go back to sleep in the middle of the night. This, when I have a submission pending and can’t wait to crash on the bed after turning it in. There goes the intense mush out of the window!
A version of this was first published here.
Image source: unsplash
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views. Individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times. If you have a complementary or differing point of view, sign up and start sharing your views too!
Multiple award winning blogger, influencer, author, multi-faceted entrepreneur, creative writing mentor, choreographer, social activist and a wanderer at heart read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Shows like Indian Matchmaking only further the argument that women must adhere to social norms without being allowed to follow their hearts.
When Netflix announced that Indian Matchmaking (2020-present) would be renewed for a second season, many of us hoped for the makers of the show to take all the criticism they faced seriously. That is definitely not the case because the show still continues to celebrate regressive patriarchal values.
Here are a few of the gendered notions that the show propagates.
A mediocre man can give himself a 9.5/10 and call himself ‘the world’s most eligible bachelor’, but an independent and successful woman must be happy with receiving just 60-70% of what she feels she deserves.
At one point, she confesses to her mother that the beatings are no longer physical, they have started affecting her mentally as well, and she wants to break free of this cycle of abuse.
Trigger Warning: This deals with domestic violence and may be triggering for survivors.
I recently watched Darlings on Netflix. It’s a quirky, dark satire featuring the dynamite duo of Alia Bhatt and Shefali Shah. The movie depicts domestic violence and the psychology of abuse.
Even though the subject matter is dark, there are light moments and humour, which make it immensely watchable. It stands out for its powerhouse performances and unique storyline.