#CelebrateingtheRainbow at the workplace – share your stories of Pride!
We decide that a girl is 'characterless' if she stays out late night for any reason, whether work or fun. It is time we realise that this is unfair.
We decide that a girl is ‘characterless’ if she stays out late night for any reason, whether work or fun. It is time we realise that this is unfair.
“Hi, there is an event which will be organised on coming Friday. Are you interested?”
“Yeah, if it is about public speaking, why not?”
“Yes, it is an open mic competition. It will be organised in Mr. Beans Café. Timings are 6 pm to 9 pm. Shall I register both of us?”
“Wait! 6 pm to 9 pm on Friday?”
“Yeah, what happened?”
“Hardik, are you crazy? Papa comes back home around 7 pm. I have to be at home before 7 pm anyhow.”
“What? That’s weird. How can an event that starts at 6 pm get over by 7 pm?”
“Yeah, Ok leave it. You get yourself registered. I’m not so interested.”
“This is weirdness at its peak. I mean who puts this kind of a time restriction for a daughter in college? Tell your father the event is important.”
“No Hardik, in any case, he would give me a maximum of 30 min relaxation. 9 pm would be too much for even asking for permission.”
“So aren’t you allowed to roam outside home late night?” I was curious to know about her actual scenario.
“Yeah, 7 pm is the maximum time in any case. Sometimes, I take a relaxation of 30 minutes, but that too happens seldom.”
“But why has your father imposed this restriction?”
“He thinks that I shouldn’t roam around (specially with male friends) after 7 pm since it is a threat to my integrity.”
“Integrity? Seriously? That’s crazy!”
“Crazy? Hardik this is his rule, and I cannot challenge it. The roads are unsafe at night, you know!”
Maybe she is right. Maybe her father is also genuinely worried. Maybe the roads are too unsafe. Maybe time restriction really plays an important role in deciding character.
But, wait, I saw her brother yesterday, partying with his friends late night in a club. There were a few male friends and 2-3 female friends. He was enjoying without having any worries about ‘late night’ or ‘character assessment’.
I was curious, surprised and confused. I thought maybe the boy lied to his parents about party, else, he should also have been at home after 7 pm. I called her again.
“Hey, don’t take it otherwise, but I think your brother cheated your parents yesterday.”
“Why? What happened?”
“He was partying with his friends late night in a club.”
“Yeah, we know this.”
My confusion, surprise and curiosity were all mixed at her reply.
“But you told me that your father doesn’t allow you to stay outside home after 7 pm.”
“Idiot, that rule applies only to me, not to my brother. He can roam around till as much time as he wants.”
Yes, needles of clock have nothing to do when a boy stays outside home, late at night. Only the character of a girl depends on the time – if she is outside home late night, she is a characterless girl or there is a threat to her integrity.
Why do we always assess the character of a girl by her home arrival time? Why are girls always expected to come back home latest by 7-8-9 pm? And the parents who put all these restrictions on their daughters, are the same parents who don’t have any issue if their son roams around late night with his friends.
Even if a girl is outside home late night, roaming or partying with friends, it doesn’t mean that she is a characterless girl or there is a threat to her integrity. And the worst part – people aren’t concerned only if a girl is outside home for partying. They are ready to assess her character even if she is coming from a business meeting or an important career event.
Time is evolving and with it, event durations are also changing. You can neither finish any meeting exactly by 6 pm nor start any party exactly by 7 pm. There are business meetings or events late at night too, as well as late night parties.
Another major concern for parents – if she is with one of her male friend, her integrity is in danger and she could become a prey for him. Really? Are you considering all her male friends a probable rapist? If the boy is with a female friend, and she is safe with him, the same holds true for male friends of the girl too.
It is a high time that we should make an environment for girls where they breaching a 7-8-9 pm limit isn’t a punishable offense. That terrified look on a her face if she hasn’t reached home in the given time limit, shouldn’t be there anymore.
As long as you trust your daughter/sister/wife/female friend, and believe that she wouldn’t break this trust or cheat you, needles of the clock hanging in your bedroom or the time displayed on your mobile shouldn’t be the deciding factor if her character is good or bad.
Image source: shutterstock
Content Writer | Tax Consultant | Motivational Speaker | StoryTeller
Follow me on Linkedin - https://www.linkedin.com/in/hardiklashkari read more...
Women's Web is an open platform that publishes a diversity of views, individual posts do not necessarily represent the platform's views and opinions at all times.
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
Can you believe this bloke compelled me to wear only saris - full time at home- till the eighth month of my pregnancy?! The excessive heat coupled with humidity made my life miserable.
Recently when I browsed an interesting post by a fellow author on this very forum I had a sense of déjà vu. She describes the absolutely unnecessary hullabaloo over ladies donning nighties and /or dupatta –less suits.
I wish to narrate how I was in dire straits so far wearing a ‘nightie’ was concerned.
I lived in my ultra orthodox sasural under constant surveillance of two moral guardians (read Taliban) in the shape of the husband’s mom and dad. The mom was unschooled and dim-witted while the dad was a medical practitioner. But he out-Heroded the Herod in orthodoxy.
My supervisor introduced me as a valuable member of the team, emphasizing my skills and contributions rather than focusing on my gender identity. This simple act set the tone for my experience in the workplace.
As a transwoman navigating the corporate world, I had encountered my fair share of discrimination and challenges. Transitioning without the support of my parents and having limited friendships in my personal life made the journey difficult and lonely. However, when I stepped into the office, something remarkable happened, I left behind the stress and negativity, embracing a space where I could truly be myself.
Joining the marketing team as a graphic designer, I was initially apprehensive about how my colleagues would react to my gender identity. But to my surprise, the atmosphere was welcoming and respectful from day one. My supervisor, Sarah, introduced me as a valuable member of the team, emphasizing my skills and contributions rather than focusing on my gender identity. This simple act set the tone for my experience in the workplace.
As I settled into my role, I discovered that my colleagues went out of their way to make me feel comfortable and included. They consistently used my correct name and pronouns, creating an environment where I could be authentically me. Being an introvert, making friends wasn’t always easy for me, but within this workplace, I found a supportive community that embraced me for who I truly am. The workplace became a haven where I could escape the stresses of my personal life and focus on my professional growth.
Please enter your email address