A story of love, loss and second chances by Nikita Singh, releasing this Valentine’s Day.
Are you taking care of the calcium needs of your child ?
Shaving body hair is something that we learn is a ‘natural’ thing to do, while growing up into a woman. But at one point I realised that it was just some bullshit for the male gaze.
I remember the first time when one of my mother’s friends took me to the parlor and got my hands waxed. I was in the 12th and the waxing pain shook me. But then I knew or was ‘taught’ that I was a grown up lady and to look pretty and beautiful and desirable, waxing is a ‘natural’ process to go through.
I didn’t mind that because I wanted to look pretty amidst all the ‘inferiority complex’ that I had since childhood. The process continued and every time it pained, I used to ask “why?”, and the answers were
It was during my graduate years that I started thinking about these concepts of ‘prettiness’, ‘beauty’, ‘Guys love…’, and reached the conclusion that I did not want to look pretty/ beautiful for a guy or for society. I did not want to cater to anybody’s desires.
I understood the reasons for the ‘beautification’. I decided that I will not be getting my body waxed during my 2nd year in graduate college, but the trauma started when my mother, cousins and college mates got to know about it. It’s a huge step to go against society, almost like challenging a societal norm, and amidst all their advice, body shaming by cousins, and strict orders from mother, I was forced to get myself waxed.
However, my conviction of not getting my body waxed or shaved got stronger with time, and I made sure that I do it only once or twice a year, specifically for attending weddings or other events at home. It was just to avoid those judgmental looks and body shaming.
It was last year when my abusive ex started body shaming me for not getting my body shaved, and it made me feel like a slave doll who was supposed to get her hair removed to cater to the demands of my ex to keep him hitched.
It was the moment of realization for me that my conviction was different but it was right. That I knew my worth since graduation, that I could think of something other women can’t. That I am born to go against the flow.
It has been 10-months now that I have completely boycotted shaving my body hair. Generally people come with a number of illogical arguments about how waxing is to clean up the body. But now that I am a fairly well-read woman, scientifically, our body hair are there to save our skin from dirt, be it our mustache, eyelashes, or hair on hand and legs. Even the pubic hair is there to stop letting dirt affect the most sensitive part of our body- Our Vagina.
Now that not only I have more conviction about what I believe in, but also have the logical reasoning behind my conviction, I wholeheartedly love my body hair. I do not get myself waxed to add another pain to my life, and I am living life strongly. I still look pretty, and I am still beautiful, but this time, it’s just for MYSELF.
Image source: shutterstock
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The more we speak out and express our courage on the subject, the more other women will be encouraged to do the same, so thank you for this article.
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