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A woman is often targeted; everywhere - in personal life, in public, online - everything and everything considered par for the course, just because she's a woman!
A woman is often targeted; everywhere – in personal life, in public, online – everything and everything considered par for the course, just because she’s a woman!
She has to feel like the sun could burn her if she stands directly under it without the protection of her multi-layered attire.
So when a girl walks out wearing clothes from neck to toes, she wonders if she is safe, because her mother insisted she would be.
She knows she’s not.
People tell her “You’re safe! It’s all okay!” but it’s not and it’s not the sun that scares her!
From childhood to adulthood girls are never allowed to show skin, ever.
If at all at any point they do, they’re slut shamed for it verbally, physically, mentally, emotionally, by parents, friends, relatives, and strangers on the road.
Until man decides to whack them for no reason at all when they’re on the street and he masturbates as they walk by, just because.
She knows someone somewhere is watching her, just because she’s a woman.
She knows someone somewhere is plotting to hurt her, just because she’s a woman.
When a man whistles at her as she walks across the road, she thinks it’s her fault. She immediately thinks of the mole between her breasts and curses, wondering if her kurti has too low a neck.
When a man ogles at her, she thinks she made him do it. She may have looked at him for a second too long, or maybe she had it coming because she wore a t-shirt that covered her completely, but that’s never enough and she knows it.
When a man masturbates, he enjoys her terror at the realisation of what he’s doing. She thinks she should’ve acted slower, gotten him caught in the act and made sure that she took slow steps towards the matter.
When a man rapes her, she is made to feel that it was her fault and she invited it. The worst part is that if it isn’t rape, it isn’t even a crime. So long as her senses have suffered, but her ‘body is still pure’, she is considered to be fine.
To the world, I, am a woman only if!
Only if, I have become the living avatar of Goddess Kali and taken my revenge.
After all, I cannot feel mutilated before I feel anger, and once I feel the anger, I’m acting irrationally.
So when men do things to us, look at us in a way we know is wrong, touch us in a way we don’t want, force us to feel things that make us cower in fear as we cross the street in broad daylight, we feel men don’t care if a woman feels, screams, or breathes.
It feels like they’re hollering, “She’s a woman. She knows what’s coming to her.”
We are never allowed to feel completely safe, because we are baby making machines.
Every time something bad happens to one of us, we try to subdue the pain thinking at least it wasn’t a bad as…, till it gets as bad and then worse and there’s no way out.
Published here earlier.
Image source: pixabay
Professionally, I am a content developer and editor. Other times I'm involved in various activities as a freelance blogger/writer, volunteer in my college's alumni association, career coach, tattoo and skating enthusiast. read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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