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Marriage is not an easy card to play. We tend to get stuck in places. Here are 5 tips to make your marriage successful.
Marriage is not always an easy game to play. We tend to get stuck in places. Here are 5 tips to make your marriage successful.
Marriage, it’s an amazing bond between two individuals held together by love, understanding, care and compassion. Like any other human relationship, it has trying and testing situations. Mine is not an exception. At the end of the day, what keeps a couple together is the desire and willingness to be with each other.
In Indian and many other cultures, marriage is considered sacred. It is an eternal bond that stays beyond the boundaries of time and life. Times have changed, and so has the relevance of marriage. So what is the formula to keep the marriage intact in today’s fragile world where relationships are not considered an asset and partners are changed like clothes?
Actually there is no formula but there do exist some amazing ways to keep your marriage fresh as the morning dew.
Marriage is not an easy relationship to keep. It needs constant work and effort. Here are 5 tips for a successful marriage which will help you to sail through.
What to expect: First year of marriage is the most crucial time. It’s the time when the couple discovers more about each other – behavior wise, likes and dislikes, social circle and their way of living. It is the most romantic as well as most stressful time for the couple. Everything is new and surprising.
Your game plan: Don’t rush, take it easy. Understand each other as a person. If something is not working out as per your expectations, don’t panic. Communicate with your partner and tell him/her your expectation clearly. Work out a way that suits both of you. Don’t start behaving like a couple all of a sudden. Be each others friend first. Relax and enjoy your new-found friendship. It will ease out the stress in a relationship and build new connections.
What to expect: After marriage your identity and status change overnight. A boy is expected to be a man and a girl is expected to become a lady. With marriage comes much social and personal responsibility. You are expected to behave in a certain way, follow the social norms and comply by some rules. Difficult isn’t it?
Your game plan: Some change after marriage is mandatory. You are starting a new life together coupled with responsibilities and loads of tender dreams. Initially, keep your hopes low. Don’t expect too much from your partner and your new life. Adjust to your surroundings and then slowly bend them as desired. Keep an open mind. Learn new things and don’t hesitate to try new things.
What to expect: During courtship, both men and women are at their best behaviour. The situation changes after marriage. The couple tends to loosen up in the comfort of home and some old habits resurface. Small issues like personal hygiene, eating habits, sleeping patterns etc might annoy you. Or you might discover some major issues that were not disclosed to you before marriage.
Your game plan: A majority of couples face this situation. Dreams are far from reality. Don’t lose hope. Handle the situation with maturity and sensitivity. Don’t confront but convey and communicate. Be honest with your partner. That doesn’t mean you need to blabber everything about your past. Be honest in your conduct. Build trust, as this is the foundation of any relationship.
What to expect: Physical intimacy plays an extremely important part in marriage. It is human nature to desire physical affection and intimacy. Men often try to impress their partner with their sexual prowess but that sometimes backfires. Some women wonder what is their role in the lovely-lovely play.
Your game plan: Discover your partner’s preferences. Surprise each other, be playful and flirty. If you have a limited imagination, feel free to search the web. You will find hundreds of lovely ideas to spice up your life. Be adventurous. Upgrade from plain vanilla to chocolate or strawberry.
What to expect: The sudden change in your lifestyle, new responsibilities, new relationships would take a toll on you. Marriage is not easy and caring for each other is a challenge. You would face real issues and situations from now on. In a bid to keep everything under control, couples tend to neglect each other. Seriousness and boredom creeps in. If not dealt with in time, these small problems can become major obstacles in your married life.
Your game plan: Don’t take yourself and life too seriously. Agreed, it’s too much to deal with marital obligations. But don’t get bogged down by the chaos. Don’t lose your playful streak. Playing silly pranks, calling each other names, doing funny stuff take the steam out of your burdened mind. Keep your inner child alive and happy.
So marriage is as simple and as difficult too! Enjoy it to make it work. It’s not a responsibility or a chore, marriage is a melody if you can listen and sing along. Discover its pleasures and enhance the experience with your personal touch.
Holding Hands image via Shutterstock
First published at the author’s blog
Garima nag runs a successful Travel & Lifestyle blog, Sweetsharing.com. Her work is seen regularly on many national & international media platforms. She is an independent thinker, dotting mother, passionate Traveler with a coffee travel book read more...
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Neena was the sole caregiver of Amma and though one would think that Amma was dependent on her, Neena felt otherwise.
Neena inhaled the aroma that emanated from the pan and took a deep breath. The aroma of cumin interspersed with butter transported her back to the modest kitchen in her native village. She could picture her father standing in the kitchen wearing his white crisp kurta as he made delectable concoctions for his only daughter.
Neena grew up in a home where both her parents worked together in tandem to keep the house up and running. She had a blissful childhood in her modest two-room house. The house was small but every nook and cranny gave her memories of a lifetime. Neena’s young heart imagined that her life would follow the same cheerful course. But how wrong she was!
When she was sixteen, the catastrophic clutches of destiny snatched away her parents. They passed away in a road accident and Neena was devastated. Relatives thronged her now gloomy house and soon it was decided that she should be married off.
Women today don’t want to be in a partnership that complicates their lives further. They need an equal partner with whom they can figure out life as a team, playing by each other’s strengths.
We all are familiar with that one annoying aunty who is more interested in our marital status than in the dessert counter at a wedding. But these aunties have somehow become obsolete now. Now they are replaced by men we have in our lives. Friends, family, and even work colleagues. It’s the men who are worried about why we are not saying yes to one among their clans. What is wrong with us? Aren’t we scared of dying alone? Like them?
A recent interaction with a guy friend of mine turned sour when he lectured me about how I would regret not getting married at the right time. He lectured that every event in our lives needs to be completed within a certain timeframe set by society else we are doomed. I wasn’t angry. I was just disappointed to realize that annoying aunties are rapidly doubling in our society. And they don’t just appear at weddings or family functions anymore. They are everywhere. They are the real pandemic.
Let’s examine this a little closer.
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