How I Gain My Inspiration From My Domestic Help – My ‘Calm’wali Bai!

Posted: August 9, 2016

We can learn from absolutely anyone, if we open our heart and minds. Here is a touching account of taking everyday inspiration from domestic help.

This note is lovingly dedicated to the women force which always keeps me calm and happy at all times. Well, of course they get paid and are expected to do so, but the amazing part is that they do this every single day and most importantly, with their heart and soul filled with happiness and joy!

The way they appear, smile, behave and do their daily, highly monotonous chores with the greatest levels of energy and enthusiasm clearly indicates that these are a bunch of highly spirited women who have cracked the ‘happiness code‘ and all this without any self-help books or any life coach to lead them on. I draw a lot of inspiration in my own journey towards happiness from these women.

My first wonder lady is Janaa

A 29 year old woman, a mother of 2 boys, who lives in a joint family of 10 people in a 1-room chawl and works for at least 10 hours a day doing the regular jhadoo-pocha-bartan work.

I have known her for the last 15 years. She works at my mom’s place and I have seen her all through her transition from a coy newly wed to a mother of two, going through the usual saas-bahu drama and working till the last day of her pregnancy without much pampering and affection of her loved ones.

But, during all these years what simply amazes me is that the only make-up she wears every single day is her smile and it only gets better with time. She is diligent, hard-working, compassionate and kind.

The second super girl is Leela tai

She is under 30 years of age, got divorced and remarried 5 years back, loves children but unfortunately unable to conceive and spends heavily on all possible treatments to be a mother ( I pray to God to bless her abundantly) and has to be constantly pushed to speak.

What I get so inspired by is her ability to speak and smile with her eyes. She secretly smiles through her work and is one of the most compassionate people I know. This has also helped Soham, my 10 year old son, to get a first-hand experience of kindness and compassion.

Last, but certainly not the least, is my Sunshine aka Supriya maushi

The lady who rules my kitchen and my heart. She is a mother of 3 beautiful girls, a dutiful wife and one of the happiest people I have known. Full of energy, brimming with happiness, the best-dressed cook ( with a jhatak red clutch and a lovely gajra in her hair) and the best sight I get to see every morning at 6:30 am, when I am still struggling to look normal and in the midst of getting Soham up and ready for school.

And, thankfully, I am blessed to see her again in the evening, when I get back from work. She is again there waiting to receive me with the widest smile and a reassuring look that says ‘Aal is well!’

I can’t thank God enough for these super women in my life and I love to flaunt them as neighbour’s envy, owner’s pride!

I don’t flaunt this for my ability to employ them but for their ability to teach and enlighten me with some amazing facts of life. These women come from a different economic strata, don’t have the luxury and indulgence that we all are blessed with, have some really stressful politics back home, and yet they know the true meaning of Live and Let Live.

They follow and practice some of the basic fundamentals of being happy

They love their work and derive a great sense of accomplishment from what they do.

They are kind and compassionate.

They smile with their heart.

They have an attitude of gratitude.

They stay calm and positive at all times.

While there are many more ways of being happy and plenty of happiness theories and case – studies prescribing this, these women practice the fundamentals of happiness and clearly teach me and my boys every single day how we are all hard-wired for happiness! There is no need to base our happiness on any external factors or possessions and our happiness quotient clearly lies within each of us. Go, kiss the world!

I gain a lot of inspiration from these real, happy and healthy women and I have clearly coined them as my coterie of ‘calm’ wali bais and not the kaamwalis that most of us women are constantly trying to conquer.

Cheers and more power to my happy gang!

Published here earlier.

Image source: shutterstock

I am Rachana Gupta, a happy and highly spirited woman, who loves being the sunshine

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1 Comment


  1. You bet! I loved the theme and content of this post! These women are true women of substance and very inspiring, I agree! Thanks for reminding us that we don’t need to look far to learn or be inspired!!!

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