A Mother Also Has Just One Life To Live, So It’s Ok If You Set Boundaries With Kids!

Sacrifices should not be glorified and boundaries should be respected. Yes, your life revolves around your kids, but do not forget to take yourselves on that jolly ride! It is not selfish!

It is needless to say that a girl returns from her maika (mom’s place) with double the luggage!

The same happens in my case too. My mom already keeps stuff bought for me, but I always raid her wardrobe. Her trendy sarees, dresses, kurtis, and accessories are mine without any terms and conditions! She does not say NO and I did not bother to think about her. Some of her stuff which I got from her temporarily has been lying in my cupboard for years now, unused!

How many times do we take our mother for granted? How many times do we fail to notice her efforts, sacrifices, and compromises? How many times do we acknowledge her feelings? How many times do we let her know she is special and she matters? How many times do we let her follow her heart and be her? How many times do we purposefully take out time to spend with her? How many times do we remember her choices and give her presents without it being her birthday, for the innumerable things she does for us daily? If the answer to all the questions is NO then you should read this piece ahead!

My parents were about to attend a reunion party with my dad’s school friends. I was more excited than them because I had never seen my parents socialize apart from relatives! I always wanted to see my parents socialize outside as well as it would be a different experience for them!

The next morning I called my mom to know all about it. She elaborated the whole evening very well. In the end, I asked her to share pictures on WhatsApp, which she did. I checked all the pictures and called her back,

“Why are you wearing the same Banarasi Silk saree for the umpteenth time?” I asked in a very bossy tone.

She politely replied, “What’s wrong with that saree?”

“No. nothing. You look nice in it. But still, you could wear something else na…” I said in a little low tone.

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“Ok. Next time we will do a video call to decide what I should wear! Fine?” she said in a playful tone.

The call got over and I was about to go for a bath before which I opened my cupboard only to realize that more than half of my cupboard is occupied by stuff I got from her. So how will she be wearing trendy stuff if I keep borrowing all her new shopping? It shocked me, and I sat on the bed feeling bad about why did I do so all this while. I should not have blamed her because the fault is mine in the first place.

I remembered how kiddish it was of me to playfully fight with my son for a bar of chocolate which I hate sharing, just last week! And here I am realizing that it is okay to say NO to kids as a mother. On my next visit to Mom’s place, I did a little shopping for her, gifted her new stuff, and chose not to raid her wardrobe again!

Sacrifices should not be glorified and boundaries should be respected. A mother has also got one life to live, if she does not live it now then when? To all mothers who think their life revolves around their kids, yes it does; but do not forget to take yourselves on that jolly ride! It is not selfish!

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About the Author

Nilshree Damani Yelulkar

A mother, homemaker, self-published author, founder, and podcast host at Authoropod. read more...

28 Posts | 17,226 Views

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