Ladies! Why Feel Guilty About Indulging In Some Self Care?

Self care does not equate with selfishness! It will prepare you to face your challenges again, give you that necessary boost to self esteem.

My very close friend listed the tasks she had to complete before her trip to Italy. The plants needed to be tended to, the bags had to be packed, the house was supposed to be left spic and span, and there were myriads of other chores. What made me heartily pleased was that she squeezed into her list a plan to go for a nice haircut.

That was the least that she was doing for herself, with other jobs being given higher priority. That brings me to raise the question. Why do many women feel so guilty when it comes to self-care? Does this question resonate with you?

Over time, women, more than men, are perceived to be the primary caregivers who are governed by a sense of commitment and responsibility towards the family. They have been conditioned to believe that taking care of others comes first and that they can think about themselves only if there is a little bit of time left. That mindset definitely needs to change.

Brace yourself and bid goodbye to the line, “I have no time for myself!”

Neglecting your needs has adverse effects. It takes a toll not just on your physical health but on your mental and emotional growth as well. If you constantly overlook your needs, stress and anxiety will build up over time, and you will not be able to function normally. Remember that you are human and that you have your limitations. Self-care, therefore, needs to be accommodated into your daily routine not as a luxury but as a necessity.

You may be wearing the cape of the super mom who runs the house efficiently, and it is fine if you enjoy doing so. At the same time, it is important that you remember that besides being an awesome mother, you are also someone else.

If you are a dedicated professional who achieves all her targets in the workplace, it is something that you need to be proud of. However, don’t aim to achieve these goals by putting yourself under stress and ignoring your physical wellbeing.

Self-care does not equate with selfishness!

It is not uncommon to see people around us for whom the “I” factor is shamelessly strong. The word “we” does not exist in their dictionary. As long as they have all that they want, they do not care about others. They lack empathy, and they are totally insensitive to the feelings of others. These are the members of the selfish club.

There is a clear distinction between selfishness and self-care. Self-care does not mean that you detach yourself from others and focus only on yourself. It means that while taking care of your loved ones, you also work around your schedule and do what you can to keep yourself happy and healthy.

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Make self-care an everyday ritual, and be a better version of yourself!

The term “self-care” sounds fancy and may be misleading by giving the impression of something expensive and extravagant. Well, not at all! You do not need to indulge in extensive retail therapy, go to the Swiss Alps, or buy a beauty pack at an exorbitant price. In the simplest of ways, you can take care of yourself. Discover the ways that make you smile, and help release your stress. The choices to brighten up your life are endless, and you just need to pick yours.

The self-care essentials that you need to embrace:

  • Compromising on your health is never an option. It needs to be your topmost priority. Don’t postpone your check-ups with the doctor. We may have a tendency to do so, but many ailments can be cured when caught at the right time.
  • From early on, keep an eye on your diet. While making sure that everyone else around you eats  well, do not forget that you need to do the same!
  • Even if it is for a few minutes a day, incorporate exercise into your routine. Physical activity helps to release the brain’s feel-good hormones, also known as endorphins.
  • Spend time with like-minded people. Pour out your thoughts to those you consider your true friends. Conversations are soulful therapy.
  • Pay attention to how you groom yourself. This does not entail that you dress in designer clothes and be the fashion diva. It is just about maintaining a well-kempt appearance that increases your confidence.

Finally, think wisely: don’t let your heart rule your head

Strengthen yourself to accept that it is all fine if you have not been able to accomplish all your tasks. That is not something to feel guilty about.

You may be the best chef around with a house full of foodies. That does not mean that you need to whip up half a dozen dishes at the cost of being totally exhausted.

Nurture the power of self-love. Go ahead if you want to simply laze around, and relax with a book, listen to music, or just watch your favorite show. Some of the work may have been left undone, but you will feel a lot more relaxed and invigorated. And yes, the world certainly did not fall apart and will still go on!

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About the Author

Rashmi Bora Das

Rashmi Bora Das is a freelance writer settled in the suburbs of Atlanta. She has a master’s degree in English from India, and a second master’s in Public Administration from the University of read more...

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