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Being born into privilege is not crime; it is not even something that one has control over. What is unfortunate is the lack of self-awareness in those with privilege.
A short video of Sonam Kapoor chatting with Rajkummar Rao went viral recently. It is a clip from an old video, but given how conversations around nepotism and privilege are always hot button topics on social media, the video seems to have gained a new life.
When people with privilege deny that privilege; and worse claim to face the same hardships as others, it can be hard to swallow.
https://twitter.com/hoopoe_is_here/status/1634288155607306240
Sonam Kapoor is a true blue star-kid; she can be classified as what today is known pejoratively as a ‘nepo-kid’. In this video, she is seen speaking with Rajkummar Rao about being the son/daughter of a film star and whether it helps.
Do you think it helps, she asks?
For his part Rao says with great understatement I think it does; demonstrating remarkable restraint I feel. In his place I would have asked, how is this even a question?!
Privilege is an invisible set of unearned assets that individuals benefit from daily, but may not be aware of. It can be compared to an invisible knapsack filled with various advantages such as special provisions, connections, maps, visas, blank checks… Never miss real stories from India's women.Register Now – Thx Peggy McIntosh pic.twitter.com/QVAPr0VqSm — Dilip Mandal (@Profdilipmandal) March 11, 2023
Privilege is an invisible set of unearned assets that individuals benefit from daily, but may not be aware of.
It can be compared to an invisible knapsack filled with various advantages such as special provisions, connections, maps, visas, blank checks…
– Thx Peggy McIntosh pic.twitter.com/QVAPr0VqSm
— Dilip Mandal (@Profdilipmandal) March 11, 2023
As this tweet quoting Peggy Macintosh points out, privilege is often invisible, particularly to the privileged person. In fact, being unaware of one’s privilege is itself a privilege. That privilege manifests in many different ways: contacts, social networks, access, resources and much more. Privilege gets people into doors that remain shut to others.
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Kapoor’s superstar father had the resources to give her an expensive education in her chosen field. He also had the kind of contacts that gave her access to people and places others couldn’t even dream of. Kapoor reels off a list of top filmmakers of the industry that her dad knows and is on first name terms with, who watched her grow up.
So apparently her ‘struggle’ is that her dad didn’t know her preferred director well enough. She says she ‘auditioned her ass off’, supremely oblivious to the fact that just getting those auditions itself was a vast privilege.
Further, being a star-kid gives actors repeated chances even when they turn out dud films that don’t work. Case in point: people like Bobby Deol, Abhishek Bachchan and many others. People like Kapoor, Deol and Bachchan may have talent, but where a flop film would cause doors to slam shut in other faces, those doors remain open for them.
When Ananya Pandey started talking against Nepotism, Siddhant Chaturvedi had one the best replies for her.MUST MUST watch this till the end. pic.twitter.com/uhonsaGnXQ — Rajeev N. Verma (@Rajeev_NV) January 1, 2020
When Ananya Pandey started talking against Nepotism, Siddhant Chaturvedi had one the best replies for her.MUST MUST watch this till the end. pic.twitter.com/uhonsaGnXQ
— Rajeev N. Verma (@Rajeev_NV) January 1, 2020
It is a little like when poor little rich girl Ananya Pandey spoke about her ‘struggle’ offering as an illustration the fact that her dad was not invited on Koffee with Karan. Her ‘struggle’ consisted of having a father who isn’t a legit A-lister.
Similarly, star-kid Sara Ali Khan gets to ‘prank’ a spot girl by shoving her into a pool without consequence. Janhavi Kapoor gets to ‘playfully’ slap colleague Varun Sharma in an interview without too many eyebrows being raised.
This interview is from 2017 and I would like to believe that Alia Bhat has gained a lot of self-awareness since then. However, at the time she displayed a staggering lack of it, claiming to want to punch all those people who say that star kids have it easy. With the same easy obliviousness, she speaks about being her father’s daughter and having the option to call Karan Johar whenever required.
Again, her assertion that people from non-film backgrounds become ‘part of this family’ smacks of that same lack of awareness of how the film industry is hostile to outsiders; how it closes ranks in favour of its own.
Not releated to BTS, But the choreo/performance of Natu Natu is insane! #Oscars #RRRpic.twitter.com/qUevifmnbU — BTS Charts Daily⁷ (@btschartsdailys) March 13, 2023
Not releated to BTS, But the choreo/performance of Natu Natu is insane! #Oscars #RRRpic.twitter.com/qUevifmnbU
— BTS Charts Daily⁷ (@btschartsdailys) March 13, 2023
The film RRR is currently riding high on the Oscar it won for best original song. It struck me that the two fabulous dancers on the Oscar stage are not the original actors N. T. Rama Rao Jr. and Ram Charan. Both men are the sons of superstars, and it was a major coup for S S Rajamouli to get both on board for the film. Now while I have no doubt that the two actors are great dancers, I wonder why they didn’t perform on stage live at the Oscars.
During the shooting of the song they would have had many chances /retakes to get their moves perfect. That isn’t possible in a life performance. The fact that Billy Mustapha and Jason Glover did the actual dance live on stage saved the two original stars from the possible risk of making a mistake with some tremendously challenging choreography. To my mind, this is a part of that privilege: the massive clout that comes from being a star-kid that everyone wants to promote and protect.
Being born into privilege is not crime; it is not even something that one has control over. What is unfortunate is the lack of self-awareness in those with privilege. When a person with privilege denies that privilege or tries to justify their own success as being the result only of ‘hard-work’ or ‘talent’ – that isn’t just lack of self-awareness that is actually self-delusion.
A former lawyer, now freelance writer, fauji wife, mother, singer, knitter and lover of my own cooking, I have altogether too many opinions and too few convictions. The more I learn the more I am read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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