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Poonam Pandey On Her Abusive Relationship: It Took Me 4 Yrs To Call The Police On Him!

It's a classic case of abuse, where your abuser first makes you believe that no one will love you, but them. And that you are not worth anything if they move away.

Trigger Warning: This speaks of violence against women and domestic abuse and may be triggering to survivors.

I was watching the reality show Lock Upp yesterday, in which Poonam Pandey talks about her abusive relationship.

She was with this guy for 4 years. And he would beat the shit out of her. She owes a 4 storied house with a staff. She paid for everything. Yet her then partner would have complete control over her life. He would not let her take her phone out of the room. Remember she paid all bills.

Her right part of the head still hurts and she needs to undergo periodic treatment, as she has been bashed against the wall many times. She has also lost her sense of smell as he broke her nose many times.

Poonam Pandey is not a woman who had no resources to have control over her own life. Yet it took her 4 years to call the police to intervene.

A classic case of abuse and gaslighting

It’s a classic case of abuse, where your abuser first makes you believe that no one will love you, but them. And that you are not worth anything if they move away.

That’s what abusers do. They first play with your head. And make you believe in your worthlessness. And then it’s always a downward spiral from there. Always.

Abusers are smart. They try this with a little smirk here and there as they convince you sneakily that you are not worth anything if they are not in your life. And then it goes to a traumatic extent.

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If this sounds familiar in your life, RUN

I don’t know who needs to hear this. But if anyone tells you your life is worthless without them, its a huge red flag. Run today. People who love you don’t abuse you.

It’s a dysfunctional system that makes an abused believe that they deserve it. You don’t deserve it. No one does. And that person is not your Messiah. Today love yourself hard and run. Don’t get used to abuse. It will make you defunct.

This is valid for all genders.

I am sorry if you are going though it. But run. Now.

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About the Author

Paromita Bardoloi

Proud Indian. Senior Writer at Women's Web. Columnist. Book Reviewer. Street Theatre - Aatish. Dreamer. Workaholic. read more...

206 Posts | 1,019,219 Views

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