Umm…The Problem Is My Spouse Loves Me ‘Too Much’ & I Feel Suffocated!

Since no two people are alike, what seems like claustrophobic for one might be love for the other, especially if your spouse is clingy!

Relationships they say are ‘work in progress’, where both partners need to put in the effort to keep it working.

While each relationship is different from the other, one common thing between all romantic relationships is spending time together. The amount of time you spend together determines how well you are bonded and understand each other. After all, you are well acquainted with a person’s needs, habits and personality traits only when you spend time with them.

In the initial stages of a relationship with dopamine-induced euphoria, it is obvious to spend your maximum time with your partner. While newlyweds usually display the ‘joined at the hip’ phenomenon, many couples in long term relationships also think love means never being apart. They feel one should spend their maximum time with their partner to keep the spark alive.

Newlywed couples or for the matter anyone who is in the initial phases of a relationship seem inseparable. They slowly start giving up on their hobbies and social life without knowing or might realise but just don’t dare to voice it. Weekends might usually be spent together doing things which one partner likes while the other one just obliges, to keep him/her happy thus giving up on one’s hobbies, friends and thus space.

As time passes by, frustration starts building up and one might feel claustrophobic in the relationship.

Since no two people are alike, what seems like claustrophobic for one might be love and togetherness for the other especially if your spouse is clingy. One might feel the need to voice his /her opinion but might fear doing so thinking he/she might hurt the other one.

While it’s very necessary to spend time together as partners, it is even more essential to give space to each other and nurture your hobbies and maintain your own friends’ circle.

Research shows that couples who nurture their hobbies and have a separate friends circle are much happier and can give more to their relationship. This is because they have a sense of independence and freedom while still being a part of the relationship.

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After all, you can keep someone happy only when you are happy. This induces a sense of freshness to the relationship which otherwise becomes boring getting infused in the mundane life.

The need for space is like a tight rope walk. While too little space can make one claustrophobic, too much space can weaken the bond. A fine balance has to be struck.

The trick is to strike a fine balance, never keep secrets, never wander too far and come back with double love when the need for space is met.

Image Source: Still from If Your Love Story Was A K-Drama, Netflix India/YouTube

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About the Author

dietitian Nilofar

I am a dietitian by profession,blogger by passion. I regularly blog on health,fitness and mental and physical wellbeing.For more such interesting articles watch this space. read more...

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