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When it is the woman's parents who have made her who she is today, shouldn't she be given the choice whether or not to change her surname?
When it is the woman’s parents who have made her who she is today, shouldn’t she be given the choice whether or not to change her surname?
The surname has always been a much-debated topic, especially today since women have begun being independent and getting at par with men. But how is one’s education and independence related to their surname?
Does having the government-issued certificate with their father’s surname give her the identity of being his daughter? Or does it give them the respect they deserve for being who they are?
Our mothers changed their surnames to that of their husbands’ after their marriage without any objections. However, today it has become a topic of great debate in several households where women are questioned for their choice to not change their surname.
Why shouldn’t a married woman be allowed to keep her father’s surname? Aren’t her parents the ones the reason she is whoever she is today?
Her husband and in-laws aren’t doing her any favours by ‘allowing’ her to work and earn. After all, many may claim that they barely have any interest in her salary or other benefits, they do enjoy the financial benefits too!
Recently, I read a post on surnames which got me thinking. The post said that in Valmiki Ramayana, Rama is primarily described as Kausalya’s son and Dashratha is introduced much later. In fact, even the suprabhata that some of us listen to in the mornings starts with the words ‘Kausalya Supraja Rama.’ Rama is basically described and identified as Kausalya’s son. Thus giving more importance to the mother’s role.
This doesn’t mean that the father isn’t important. However, there is no evidence is any of the scripts I read that says that a woman must change her surname to that of her husband’s after marriage. I am not really sure how and when this started and why has it become a mandatory and default thing to do.
When it is the woman’s parents who have made her who she is today, shouldn’t she be given the choice whether or not to change her surname? Why must we make it into a debate and cause problems? Or can someone give me a proper and logical explanation as to why men keep their parents’ surnames but women can’t?
When people refer to the Ramayan and Mahabharata for everything, why can’t they follow the same for the situations and issues that are relevant today?
Picture credits: Still from Hindi TV series Shaurya Aur Anokhi Ki Kahaani
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I watched a Tamil movie Kadaisi Vivasayi (The Last Farmer), recommended by my dad, on SonlyLiv, and many times over again since my first watch. If not for him, I’d have had no idea what I would have missed. What a piece of relevant and much needed art this movie is!
It is about an old farmer in a village (the only indigenous farmer left), who walks the path of trouble, quite unexpectedly, and tries to come out of it. I have tried my best to refrain from leaving spoilers, for I want the readers to certainly catch up on this masterpiece of director Manikandan (of Kakka Muttai fame).
The movie revolves around the farmer who goes about doing his everyday chores, sweeping his mud-house first thing in the morning, grazing the cows, etc and living a simple but contented life. He is happy doing his thing, until he invites trouble for himself out of the blue, primarily because he is illiterate and ignorant.