Dear Society, Stop Treating Your DIL Like A Puppet, She Is A Human Too!

Society needs to stop demeaning DILs and treating them badly for making their own choices. They are humans too, it's time you accept that!

Society needs to stop demeaning DILs and treating them badly for making their own choices. They are humans too, it’s time you accept that!

Our society needs to stop demeaning daughters-in-law. As a daughter-in-law myself, I have always wondered why DILs are not accepted the way they are.

Why are countless restrictions imposed on them in the name of stereotypes? What are the attributes that differentiate the daughters-in-law from the rest? Why are they always viewed as a separate group that is not treated with respect? Come on, let me tell you why DILs should be treated like every other individual.

They are independent too!

Like me, daughters-in-law are educated and financially independent too, especially in today’s scenario. There is no doubt that women are equally competent and educated. They earn well and yet are not treated as equals in this ‘egalitarian’ society. Isn’t that ironic?

It is saddening to see women juggle between housework and their jobs. But they are still chosen as the ones who are treated badly. It is strange to see society comment on men helping out their working wives even now. In what way is that even right?

Men Sharing domestic responsibilities is not something to be exaggerated and wondered about. Why does this society still taint DILS for such things? And why do we find it difficult to accept men helping out their wives?

Daughters in law have rights to practice their freedom too!

I don’t understand why society needs to snatch away the rights of the daughters-in-law in the name of stereotypes? Why do they set so many restrictions and cramp the DIL’s space with their mindless thoughts?

DILs are expected to request permission from their in-laws before doing anything at all? Is that acceptable in any way? Right from joining a class to purchasing sugar, why do they have to ask? Why do they need to seek approval?

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Can’t DILs live their lives as they want? I still see people degrading their daughters-in-law just because they do not act

DILS are expected to request permission from their in-laws before doing every small thing. In what way is that even acceptable?

To join a class or to purchase a packet of sugar, why does society expect approval? Can’t the DILs live their lives as they want? I often see people degrading their daughters-in-law because they don’t live according to their rules? How is that fair?

In fact, I don’t understand why society mistreats women for not conceiving as soon as they are married. What is wrong with all of that? It is their life and they can do what they want. Why are they taken for granted? And why are DILs humiliated for their principles?

Daughters-in-law are a part of your family too

Why does society treat DILs like outsiders? And why does society view them with magnifying glasses? Why do they find flaws and faults in every action of the DILs? When the DILs do not greet guests with a ‘proper’ smile, they are blamed for it. They are blamed for not wearing sarees.

Why are they blamed and unnecessarily hindered by society’s crooked mindset? Aren’t they a part of your family too? Shouldn’t this situation change?

Daughters-in-law are not care-takers by default!

Why does society assume that DILs ought to take care of every domestic responsibility? And why does society treat daughters-in-law like maids?  Why does it point fingers at DILs who are working?

And why does it keep taking digs at DILs simply because they are career-focussed? There are so many people who are against DILs who are working as they think it will affect their family life. How is that mindset even right? Aren’t DILs supposed to choose what they want? Why are they hindered and treated with no respect at all?

DILs are human beings too

What is so wrong in DILs making mistakes in cooking? Why does society keep giving them undue expletives? ‘Your DIL doesn’t cook well!’ ‘She doesn’t smile!’

I mean, who is society to judge the DILs? Aren’t DILs humans too? Don’t they have feelings of their own? When will society understand this and start seeing things with a better vision?

To conclude, all I have to say is DILs are not your puppets to take them for granted. They own their own space and life as well. So instead of making them the subject of your control and gossip, try understanding the basics of humanity and morality before you demean the DIL the next time!

Picture credits: Still from Hindi TV series Yeh Hain Mohabbatein

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About the Author

Akilandeswari Sivaramakrishnan

Founder of Sane Bites. "Splashes of Life", a list of five short stories adds to my credit in fictional writing! read more...

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