The thinking of a lot of people needs to change at least now, when it comes to the gender roles the men and women play before and after marriage. Both the men and women need to act and behave maturely and should know to obey, not only the women.
I hear a lot of people saying things to the ill mannered grown up boys like “When your wife will come, she will fix you”. Why will some another woman come and fix your 25 year old boy’s attitude who refuses to grow up into a man and learn some basic ethics? You couldn’t handle him, how do you expect some another woman to come and handle him or fix him?
Marriage is a relationship which works when both the man and the woman are ready to take up the responsibility of each other. A woman can only influence a man in a good or a bad way. But she shouldn’t be responsible to put some sense into his head or groom him into a man. She is looking to get married to a man, not an ill mannered, immature baby. Grooming him into a man, teaching values, teaching basic ethics of how to behave with people around is the responsibility of his family, not the woman he gets married to.
Why aren’t the girls of the house being told, “You can learn it all after you get married.” Just like the men. Because we feel, the whole responsibility lies on the women of the house and not the men when it comes to “BEHAVING” and that’s the reason most of the “men” are “MISBEHAVED” not the women. Teach the lessons to both.
The girls are groomed right from their young age into being the “ideal bahu” or the “ideal women”. That’s the reason , girls are more mature than the boys of her age these days. The girls are literally made to do a crash course into cooking, cleaning, walking, sitting, talking before they get married. It’s great. She should know to cook all the cuisines and serve her family but does she deserve a man who gets annoyed on the smallest of things? No, right? So why only train the women? Why not train the men to be polite? Why not teach the men that a woman is a human too and not a machine that should work at home 24/7? No I’m not against it. I would love to serve him his favourite dish but only if he respects me and loves me the way I deserve to be loved and respected. I would do everything but what if he is acting like a child over every small thing? Yeah not every man out there is like this neither every woman out there is like this but in most cases, this is how it is.
The women facing things alone and the men being in their own world of attitude and alter ego. “I’m a man. It’s her duty”. Yes it is but things can be done together, with patience , love ,care and compassion. You need not show your “I’m a man” attitude to the women you are married to. You are her protector and partner not her owner. Communicate with her, don’t only order. Respect her and see her doing things she does for you, with a smile and not a frown.
The men and women both should be taught about how they need to behave with the other person, not only the women.
Image via Pixabay
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