Bollywood’s Love For Man-Child Lead Characters Is Showcased Yet Again In Jawaani Jaaneman

Saif is a man-child, Tabu is sensible and Aaliya F in her debut is bubbly and chirpy. Jawaani Jaaneman makes you wonder if you've stepped right back in 2010!

Saif is a man-child, Tabu is sensible and Aaliya F in her debut is bubbly and chirpy. Jawaani Jaaneman makes you wonder if you’ve stepped right back in 2010!

I don’t know where to start with ‘Jawaani Jaaneman.’ So I’ll start with the basic plot. Saif is a terrible man child who parties every night and sleeps around a lot. One fine day he picks up a girl who confesses that she did some Joe Goldberg level stalking and is actually his daughter.

Saif makes a bunch of weird references to how he has never failed to use protection and that he has a running tab on condoms with the chemist. Now, this might be a really novel idea that people should start using. And if you guys are already doing it, spare me, I rarely go out of my room.

Anyway, then they do a DNA test and find out that they are in fact father and daughter. Oh and also that Tia (the daughter) is pregnant, which seems like a great point to end the movie, I swear. But I felt this way from the first few scenes where the video montages played, so I don’t really know anymore.

Moving on, the movie plot now takes a sharp turn towards sentimentality. Saif, all of a sudden, realises that he does love his daughter, the same one he was hitting on on a few days ago. They are a family now and everybody loves each other.

I do like bad movies, but not this

Now that we have the plot clear in our head, let me share a secret with you: I really like bad movies. My favourite movie of all time, definitely, is Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahaani. And I will take offence if anyone calls it a bad movie. Given this fact, I should like this movie, but I really didn’t. Most of the movie, I spent cursing myself for going and watching it. I could have just as easily stayed at home and watched Netflix in the comfort of my bed.

Well, I did have a few other thoughts so as to give you an idea of why I didn’t like it and give you a chance to decide if I were too harsh. I feel like it is a story from 2010, when I was 10 and the world was laughing over sexist jokes made by man-children and their weird antics. No one helped my come to this conclusion, I did that all by myself. And it was only after I researched this movie, I found out that it was a remake of an Argentinean ‘comedy’ called ‘Igualita A Mi.’ Can you take a wild guess when that movie was released? Yup. 2010! Gasp! Should I just start reviewing movies for a living now? Or maybe I shouldn’t given how I chose this movie to watch.

Trying too hard to be Barney Stinson?

There were a few thoughts I had while watching the movie. But my one major and persistent thought was that I could see a badly written Barney Stinson rather than Saif on screen. As the film progressed, I kept feeling like I was watching How I Met Your Mother episodes in every five-minute scene.

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For example, there is a scene where Saif’s character (Jas) has a drinking match with a younger guy. Now that reminded me of the episode where Barney tried to check things of a list of adventures he was too old to achieve. Several scenes are far too similar to be a mere coincidence. Saif was definitely living the Stinson level bachelor life, with way less charisma than Neil Patrick Harris!

For a movie that’s deemed a comedy, the laughs are few and far in between, not to mention occasionally crass. The cringiest, however, has to be the line, ‘hum dil do hai.’ It could have landed better but they made it way too obvious and unfunny.

Jas is generally the one making the audience laugh especially when he is at his wits end in various out of the ordinary situations. Then there are times when he is told that his life sounds like a movie plot and he doesn’t even bother convincing the other person that it isn’t so. Honestly, it probably wouldn’t have worked anyway since all this only happens in movies.

The only and most relatable part throughout the movie that made me laugh was Tabu telling Saif why she wouldn’t call him to tell him about their child. She tells him, “I hate phone calls.” Same, Tabu. Same.

The cast is fine-ish

Now the cast. There’s a brief cameo by Kiku Sharda who’s playing… himself? I don’t think he needed any dialogues. Chunky Pandey is so forgettable that I’d almost forgotten about him till I started writing the review.

Aaliya’s performance is natural and bubbly. However, I did think that the scene where she introduces her parents to each other could have been better. Saif, as always, is a pro at these movies given how he did these in 2010 when they could have been funny.

Tabu comes in breezily, steals the show and disappears. She should’ve gotten more lines, even though character seems a little weird. When she sees Jas, she is so sure that this is the man who is Tia’s father, despite Tia describing that the hints she got were a little confusing. This is where you realise how paper thin the plot actually is.

Fareeda Jalal also plays a part in the movie- you know the one she usually plays? Overall, the supporting cast is pretty good, except Tia’s boyfriend. I don’t really see a point to his character.

It makes you want to leave your brain at home

In the end, I would have liked to watch the movie had it been shown from Tia’s point of view, rather than Jas’. It doesn’t really delve into a number of the sub-plots it introduces which, honestly, were unnecessary. Does Jas have cash or not? What is the shady real estate agent stuff about? How is Jas’ family okay with him having a child when they were paranoid and convinced that he was gay?

The more I think about it, the more I realise that I probably should have left my brain at home, for sure!

Picture credits: YouTube

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