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The 'good Indian woman' is supposed to be one who is selfless and does everything for everyone else but herself. Time to shake off that badge!
The ‘good Indian woman’ is supposed to be one who is selfless and does everything for everyone else but herself. Time to shake off that badge!
The most satisfying relationship in our lives is the one we have with ourselves. I’ve seen extremely good looking men and women, intelligent men and women who are fun to be with hating themselves with a vengeance. And I wonder why?
As obvious as it may seem, most of us don’t really share a good relationship with our self. It’s our weight, our looks, our complexion or the fact that we may not be as successful as we desire that may make us curse ourselves. Sometimes, we seem to have everything and yet we are unhappy within ourselves.
I think it is time to make the effort to love and appreciate ourselves, warts and all. It took me some time to truly appreciate ‘me’, but now there is no looking back. Trust me: loving yourself opens new doors and in way means that you are vain or selfish.
The younger me was much more docile though outspoken. I was way too accommodating of other people’s views and letting their opinions dictate my behaviour. But over the decades, I’ve become more self-assured and less caring of the opinion of those who don’t matter. I also have no qualms in claiming time and space for myself. And now I constantly appreciate my body for how it fights back against all odds and my being for doing the right things. In my own small way, I am pretty proud of how I’ve turned out as a human being. Loving yourself means putting the focus on your health, your well-being, your nutrition, your sleep and your peace of mind. A lot of women neglect that, unfortunately. Here are 5 reasons why you need to put yourself first:
Most women are overworked especially those who handle both professional work and home chores. Not properly organizing your work, assigning priority to tasks, using time blocks for your work and chores will just end up making you frazzled and anxious, and ruining your productivity. If you are calm and relaxed, you can finish the work faster with better focus. You can also switch between chores without losing your mind. And you will understand how and when to take breaks to rejuvenate.
So having adequate sleep, a filling breakfast and other meals and a peaceful state of mind are non-negotiable on a daily basis.
Let’s be conscious of the fact that we need to give back to the bodies that we put through so much stress and work on a daily basis. Like an empty fuel tank, it will shut down if we don’t take good care of it. So invest in your gym or exercise time. Don’t skip meals and don’t feel guilty for taking off to de-stress. You deserve it to have a fully functional body and mind.
Tired women are unhappy and overwhelmed. Not only is that a recipe for disaster when you are snapping at everyone around you but it also gets precious little work done. Not to mention that you don’t make for good company.
Invest in your me-time and ask for help when you are unwell or overworked. Also give your attention to the task at hand. This will only happen when you have taken care of yourself.
There are times when as a wife or a mother, I felt that I give much more than I get in return. And often it is my fault as well. I recently wrote a post on why women need to switch off. And one of the points I dwelled upon is that as women, somehow we are not wired to just let go. We are doing so much in our head that we are unable to enjoy the moment we are experiencing.
I have started working in this direction. When I schedule my work properly and handle my household duties well, I feel happy and content. Sometimes, it means soliciting help, and I am no longer shy of asking for it. Also if I am not up for something, I say it. Either way, I am safeguarding my health and happiness now.
Just like the famous commercial went, tell yourself that you are worth it.
Don’t be guilty to go out with your girlfriends leaving your kids behind.
Don’t feel bad about doing something solo and not spending that time with your partner.
Don’t worry about the dirty dishes or clothes piling at home if you are out on a movie outing, you’ll ruin the pleasure. Live and enjoy in the moment.
Yes, you need to get rid of that guilt in doing something pleasurable. Do it because you deserve it. And you will find yourself smiling more. The world will not stop spinning if you pay it a little less attention. Loosen up and seize the moment.
I hope all of us start putting ourselves first, taking care of ourselves and falling in love with ourselves. It is a relationship that will reap you rich dividends.
Would love to hear your thoughts on the same.
Published here earlier.
Image source: By Faisal Akram from Dhaka, Bangladesh (A Day Out With Friends) [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons
Rachna Parmar is a Certified Nutritionist, cookbook writer, Editor and Health Coach. She is an enthusiastic cook, wife, fitness freak, Yoga enthusiast, and mother to two naughty sons and a Labrador. She counts reading, writing, read more...
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