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A lot of sexist behaviour is camouflaged as ‘just joking’. It’s time we called it for what it is!
Today I had posted on my timeline about how “Jacqueline Fernandez’s remix does one thing though – makes you count ‘Ek Do Teen’ till you go running to Madhuri’s Ek Do Teen for succour and that epic isn’t copyable.”
We girl pals on FB were indulging in gentle banter remarking that sadly, Jacqueline who is brave enough to be called foolhardy, ends up as a caricature thanks to the dance director and director’s ‘visions’. Hence the dance-director should bear the brunt too.
We also agreed that some songs are unbeatable because the ladies featured in them bring their innate grace to the supposed item/meat numbers.
And then, an irrelevant, sexual comment was dropped by one of the male pals. About how men stop at the bosom while we women worry about ribcage, dress etc.
For a moment I was stunned. Somehow this felt uncalled for. And this was not the first time this man had comment-bombed (for lack of a better word) and indulged in sexual innuendos. Sadly, the man is in his 50s with a growing son. So some decorum was expected.
Was I to ignore this comment hoping that someday he might realize that it isn’t kosher?
How often haven’t we laughed at those WhatsApp forwards which declared our husbands to be lazy couch potatoes who were so challenged that they needed to be directed to the kitchen counters by our able hands and sagely countenances?
But my irritation lingered on, like a festering wound.
I then unfriended the man.
Am I overreacting? Am I being a prude?
Maybe yes to both. But sometimes you have to walk the talk.
You have to say ‘No-More! This isn’t acceptable!’
And the first step begins with me.
Right now, the man might be calling me unmentionable names at my idiocy and pricey behaviour.
But I rest easy.
Because I did do right!
Anupama Jain is the author of 'When Padma Bani Paula', a breezy novel about second
Kasturi – May I send a virtual hug your way? I wrote this piece in the heat of the moment, in anger and was wondering, will I find resonance at all? Your words, redeem my faith – thanq
Thanq so much Lakshmi <3 and protesting is the key really
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