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A regular schedule of extra curricular activities for children seems to be the norm. When, then, will they have the chance to just be children, and free to just be?
The park seemed to wear a dismal look. I couldn’t hear the sound of squealing children, nor did I spot a doting parent or a loving grandparent at the bench. Except for a child or so, this park in an upscale South Delhi Colony bore a deserted look.
I found a comfortable spot, and as I sat, watching my two little girls do the monkey bars and climb up and down the slides zillion times, a young mother I knew came by. It had been weeks since I had bumped into her or her seven-year-old daughter. On enquiring, she told me how busy life was, for her and her little girl. Coming to the park was out of the question because the child was busy attending evening classes to learn swimming, tennis, gymnastics, karate, chess, drawing, Odishi dance and classical music.
Yes, you read it all right. The child stays busy through the week including weekends!
Gone are the days, when evenings are spent playing with neighbors and friends at the local park or kicking a ball at an empty ground in the locality. In a metro such as Delhi, there are issues of sorts that push the child indoors after school. Space constraints, safety concerns, plus the busy lifestyle of parents are a few of the reasons. Not to forget the shrinking size of the family, with no companion whatsoever for the child at home, and the growing menace of hand held gadgets in our daily lives.
Parents thus, find it easier, to pack a child’s day with structured activities of sorts, keeping them not only occupied (presumably productive) but also away from television and technology.
Big cities today sports classes of every kind. From ballet to piano classes, sketching to tennis, Bollywood dance classes to gymnastics, name it and you would find them around. Centres running these classes are open to young students on almost all days of the week.
Such activities of music, dance, dramatics, and sports surely do wonders to a child’s self-confidence. And when you give them a chance to learn them outside the school, it’s also another opportunity to make new friends. Much as I acknowledge this fact and also admire parents who dedicate their evenings ricocheting between classes, I prefer not subjecting myself (and my child) to many activities.
I must confess though, that this decision of mine has many a time made me feel inadequate. There is this constant Fear of Missing Out, as I see parents around ferrying children for various activities. Probably that’s what pushes many other parents too. But I constantly make an effort to remind myself that what best I can do is just equip my child with a few extra skills, to help raise his confidence. I cannot over-schedule his life, not yet.
And that truly raises a valid question- How many is too many?
Each child is different and, has his own pace to learn, develop interests and pursue passions. It pays to not push him beyond his comfort level and, allow him to discover interests on his own. Give him that blank space in his daily time table, to dream, breathe and explore the world around. Strike a balance- between free playtime and the exposure to learn something new.
Published here earlier.
Image source: By Biswarup Ganguly (Own work) [GFDL or CC BY 3.0], via Wikimedia Commons, for representational purposes only.
A blogger who writes on society and culture, hoping to bring about positive impact on as many people as possible. Read more posts on www.meotherwise.com. read more...
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People say that women are the greatest enemies of women. I vehemently disagree. It is the patriarchal mindset that makes women believe in the wrong ideology.
The entire world celebrates International Women’s Day on March 8, 2024. It should be a joyful day, but unfortunately, not all women are entitled to this privilege, as violence against women is at its peak. The experience of oppression pushes many women to choose freedom. As far as patriotism is concerned, feminism is not a cup of tea in this society.
What happens when a woman decides to stand up for herself? Does this world easily accept the decisions of women in this society? What inspires them to be free of the clutches of the oppression that women have faced for ages? Most of the time, women do not get the chance to decide for themselves. Their lives are always at the mercy of someone, which can be their parents, siblings, husband, or children.
In some cases, women do not feel the need to make any decisions. They are taught to obey the patriarchal system, which makes them believe that they are right. In my family, I was never taught to make decisions on my own. It was always my parents who bought dresses and all that I needed.
14 years after her last feature film Dhobi Ghat, storyteller extraordinaire comes up with her new film, Laapataa Ladies, a must watch.
*Some spoilers alert*
Every religion around the world dictates terms to women. The onus is always on women to be ‘modest’ and cover their faces and bodies so men can’t be “tempted”, rather than on men to keep their eyes where they belong and behave like civilized beings. So much so that even rape has been excused on the grounds of women eating chowmein or ‘men will be men’. I think the best Hindi movie retort to this unwanted advice on ‘akeli ladki khuli tijori ki tarah hoti hai’ (an alone woman is like an open jewellery box) came from Geet in Jab We Met – Kya aap gyan dene ke paise lete hain kyonki chillar nahin hain mere paas.
The premise of Laapataa Ladies is beautifully simple – two brides clad in the ghunghat that covers their identity get mixed up on a train. Within this Russian Doll, you get a comedy of errors, a story of getting lost, a commentary on patriarchy’s attitude towards women, a mystery, and a tale of finding oneself, all in one. Done with a mostly light touch that has you laughing and nodding along.
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