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Are there any simple steps to a better life? Steps that will decrease the frustration that we seem to increasingly have with our lives and options?
Frustration has become an integral part of our life. Most people are in that zone for a larger part of the time, that it may not even seem like a deliberately created feeling. It feels so natural to be frustrated when things do not go as per our expectations, and that happens a lot of times! Can we do something about it? Maybe reduce it if not eliminate it. Sharing some of the things that work for me.
Every morning after getting up (as doing it in sleep will be difficult!) thank God, or the power that you believe in, for all the blessings in your life. They could range from a slice of pizza you ate last night to the restaurant you own; from an acquaintance to the family you adore; from the crush you have to the husband you married.
You can thank for everything you already have and also for things you wish to have. Gratitude is the purest form of prayer. Example, when we say thank you God for a wonderful job, we send a message to the universe that we have a wonderful job for which we are thankful. And the universe starts to work to bring that to us. Shahrukh Khan is a brand ambassador of this truth!
The Catch: Faith – Manifestation of wishes happens when you thank with full faith, like you own it already. If that doesn’t seem possible, you can thank by believing in the process of receiving. Example, “thank you God for I am receiving good health” and feel and believe that you are receiving it.
Know that you are one with God, one with the universe, one with all. If we understand that we are one with all at the soul level, it will be much easier to let go and forgive. For when one is unable to forgive, the only person who gains negativity is the person himself.
The Catch: Like other people – ‘If I don’t like the other person how can I be one with him/her?’ Let us understand that being one with others is at the soul level. If we believe that all are one, then it becomes much easier to not be angry and irritated with others at least some times, if not always.
And another truth is that what we do to others we call on ourselves. So, if we are able to forgive people, show love and kindness to them, the same will happen with us. It’s a universal law. So, whenever you are irritated with someone, just bless that person by praying. By this you will generate positive energy in you first and then it will pass on to that other person.
Also, truth is like a diamond which has many facets. So, try to understand the other person’s perspective. Both the parties to the argument can be correct in their own right. And if that also doesn’t seem possible, in your heart say ‘I forgive you’. So your ego gets a boost by being a bigger person and maybe in the process you actually start forgiving!
Most of us are in a relentless pursuit to impress others. We would do things to be liked by our parents, friends, mom-in-laws, bosses, and our maids too! Let’s remember that the first time you are unable to behave in the appropriate way that they deem to be fit, will be the first time that they don’t like you again!
The Catch: Love yourself – If most of the times we do things the way others want us to, then we are not in love with ourselves. The first step to change this is to know who we truly are. Many a times when we try to initiate doing things our way, people don’t accept us. The reason- we don’t accept ourselves. Know that what you want to do, how you want to dress, how you want to talk, how you want to be. Accept and appreciate yourself for that, be confident of your choices, and the people around you will start to accept you as you are. So, introspect, be aware and accept.
If these people still don’t like you, follow the word ‘whatever’ from the dictionary or if you like what you are reading then go back to point number two and let go.
What do a lot of people do to feel healed when they are sad over something? When some untoward incident has happened in their lives – they talk about it to other over and over again, feeling the process to be therapeutic. But, in reality it is causing the person to go through the same sad event a number of times causing stress and pain at a lot of levels. Every time that we narrate the incident, we are creating negative energy in us which can also manifest in some form of illness if we continue to harvest these emotions.
The Catch: Stop complaining and sharing sadness – If we take our life as an experience, we would be able to take learning from all such events and move on. In my understanding, most of such events happen so that we can learn something from them and make ourselves better. If we take the positive from of the event and learn from it, not only will that heal us but will also fasten the process of our spiritual evolution.
When people ask you about such events, tell them you are doing fine and would not like to talk about it at length. I have read somewhere that don’t share your problems with people – 80% don’t care and 20% are glad you got them. It’s a choice you have to make.
Many of us compare our lives, jobs, promotions, incentives, kids with others which in turn causes a lot is stress and a feeling of dissatisfaction. Also, this may make praying through gratitude difficult.
The Catch: Live in NOW – We keep postponing our happiness over some event in the future. I will be happy when I score 99% in boards. I will be happy when I get admission to a good college; nice job; best spouse; a good vacation… the list goes on. And in between there are of course peeking moments. Nice job which is better than others; best spouse who is better looking than friend’s spouse, adorable kids who score better than others etc.
What we forget is that if we keep comparing and/or postponing our happiness, then we will never be able to be truly happy. It’s the journey that we are here to enjoy and experience. We must remember that even when you become a CEO of a company, there would be a CEO of a bigger company! There will always be some en-route desire. And when we compare, we forget that everyone has their own life journey, their own story. May be if you were given a chance to exchange your life with that other person, you will not want to.
So, compare your current performance with your last quarter’s performance, compare your marks with the last semester. Set goals for yourself and work towards them. However, the decision to buy which car should not be based on your neighbor’s car.
Image source: a better life by Shutterstock.
I am a management faculty by profession and left my full time job in June
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