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SAHM v/s Working Mom

Posted: June 21, 2013

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The decision to be a Stay-At-Home Mom (SAHM) or a Working Mom is a difficult one for many mothers.

For women who’ve become mothers after a short career (say less than 2 years) or those who’ve never worked or those who’re very sure that they don’t want to work once they’ve become mothers, it’s probably a natural choice to be Stay-At-Home Moms.

But for women who’ve had a long corporate career (say more than 8 years) or those who’re ambitious about their career goals or those who need to earn income to keep the house running or those who “truly love” their work – It becomes a difficult choice.

Womens choices - SAHM or working mom?Should you be a “Stay-At-Home Mom” or a “Working Mom” is a difficult decision.

If you do decide to be a “Working Mom”, you’re bound to ask yourself a few hard questions:

– Will it come at a price in terms of your child’s growth and development?
– Does it come with a price in terms of the emotional turmoil you go through as women? No matter how strong and focused a working mother is, there are moments of self-doubt, guilt, uncertainty, frustration, a feeling of whether it was all worth it?
– Am I doing the right thing?

If you do decide to be a “Stay-At-Home Mom”, you’re again bound to ask yourself a few hard questions:

– Does this choice come at a price in terms of fulfilling your own personal aspirations and ambitions?
– When you step into your 40’s or 50’s, is there not a feeling of “If only I had worked how life could / would have been..?”
– What is “MY” identity? Is it as X’s wife, Y’s mother or Z’s daughter only?

No easy answers for the above.

Being Stay-At-Home Moms has its positives and negatives – both for the mother and child

Being Working Moms has its share of positives and negatives – both for the mother and child

It is a personal choice; one which women should take responsibility or ownership for.

Based on my personal experience as a working mother, here’s what I can say

– Take a decision, and take responsibility for it. Don’t regret every single day for your choices and decisions. Once you’ve made the choice, do your best every single day.
– It is important for women to be open to review her own decision over a span of time, and see if she’d like to change her choices. So for e.g.: I know a lot of women who are working mothers till their kids are a specific age, and then convert to Stay-At-Home Mom’s out of choice. Or a lot of Stay-At-Home Mom’s who become Working Mothers when their kids hit a specific age.

So, make a choice. Take ownership for it. Accept the pros and cons. But be open to review your own choices as your circumstances change!

There’s no RIGHT or WRONG! It’s just a personal choice!

Pic credit: Scarygami (Used under a Creative Commons license)

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