Check out 16 Return-To-Work Programs In India For Ambitious Women Like You!
This month’s brand-new 15 minute episode of the Modern Family podcast features Tanzila, who recently married for love against the wishes of both families.
“Love… bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails,” says the Bible. It’s a wonderful sentiment to aspire to, and like all aspirations, considerably hard to achieve.
An entire generation of Indians, mostly urban and educated, are now choosing their own life partners. Girls are paying for their own weddings to boys they met at work or college. From arranged marriages and love marriages, Indians are now talking of “arranged love marriages”. Even Bollywood, that dependable indicator of popular attitudes, has retreated into Reasonable India, where inter-faith / inter-caste / inter-regional marriages are no longer taboo or even all that unusual. Only barbarians and bigots stand opposed to love in this India wherein Aamir Khan proclaims its sanctity on national television.
But reality, as we have learned over the course of this series, can be much more complicated and confusing, not to mention more interesting. When I began this conversation with Tanzila, for instance, I was looking at a young woman who’d married outside her faith, against the wishes of both families, and was now living with her in-laws. As a citizen of Reasonable India, I never imagined that her weight would be the primary problem in her relationship with her in-laws. Nor did I think of her mother-in-law’s motivations until Tanzila brought it up.
This frank and unexpectedly intimate chat is perhaps the best conclusion to the Modern Family podcast because it reminds us that human relationships chart their own course against our expectations. People are seldom the simple caricatures we see on paper, they’re the complicated result of their environment and expectations.
As Dr. Philip pointed out in an earlier episode, the old ways are crumbling and with them we lose the clearcut blueprints for marriage that our elders relied upon. We’re pioneers, each and every one of us. And our successes appear to divide us from our more traditional, more rural cousins. It is with a conflicted identity that we look toward the future.
Let us hope, then, that Love never fails.
Click to play or download to listen at your leisure.
Women's Web is a vibrant community for Indian women, an authentic space for us to be ourselves and talk about all things that matter to us. Follow us via the read more...
Stay updated with our Weekly Newsletter or Daily Summary - or both!
If her home and family seem to be impacted by her career then we expect her to prioritize her ‘responsibilities at home as a woman’ and leave her job.
The entrenched patriarchal norms have always perpetuated certain roles and responsibilities as falling specifically in the domain of either men or women. Traditionally, women have been associated with the domestic sphere while men have been considered the bread winner of the household. This division of roles has become so ingrained in our lives that we seldom come to question it. However, while not being questioned does give the system a certain level of legitimacy, it in no way proves its veracity.
This systematic division has resulted in a widely accepted notion whereby the public sphere is demarcated as a men’s zone and the private sphere as belonging to women. Consequently, women are expected to stay at home and manage the household chores while men are supposed to go out and make a living with no interest whatsoever in the running of the household.
This divide is said to be grounded in the intrinsic nature of men and women. Women are believed to be compassionate, affectionate and loving and these supposedly ‘feminine’ qualities make them the right fit for caring roles. Men, on the other hand are allegedly more sturdy, strong and bold and hence, the ones to deal with the ordeals of the outside world.
Investing in women means many things beyond the obvious meaning of this IWD2024 theme, as the many orgs doing stellar work can show us.
What does it mean to invest in women?
Telling the women in our lives how great we think they are? That we value the sacrifices they have made? (Usually though not necessarily only – a sacrifice of their aspirations, careers and earning potential in order to focus on family).
No, thank you. Just talk is no longer going to cut it. Roses and compliments are great, but it’s time people, leaders, organizations put their money, capital, resources on track instead.
Please enter your email address