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Being born and raised in an Indian society, my parents and relatives always made me believe that God has given life to fulfill certain roles and responsibilities and one of them is to get married and have kids and by not doing so equals disrespecting God. I have always questioned my father on this because I was one of those persons who didn’t want to get married but he always said the human cycle has been divided into phases and it is important to be a part of each phase.
I work with the Embassy of the Republic of Congo. I got married in 2022 (which obviously is late as per the Indian standard marriage age norms) before my seniors at work used to question me often about my marriage, they used to say, “It is getting late, it is important to get married and have kids; God like this”.
Once a lady from a travel company came for a meeting at the Embassy and she looked to be in her early 40’s. My diplomat asked her in general about her husband and family; she replied that I don’t want to get married and have kids, I am happy alone and you should have seen the reaction of my diplomat.
I have witnessed few people who have seen toxic relationships at their home who don’t believe in marriage and I feel it’s completely ok to be like that. I am in my 30’s and I have witnessed a radical shift in the concept of marriage. There are more divorces now than successful marriages because people don’t value relationships and I feel rather than going through the mental torture one experiences during the divorce duration it is better to remain single.
I, personally know how I am, I know how adjustable I am and I only know will I be able to amend myself after marriage the way it is required; nobody else can answer this on my behalf. If I am aware that my habits that I can’t change can be a hindrance, then why not make decisions wisely.
I am not saying parents should blindly agree but at least they should try to understand the reasons if their children don’t want to get married. Sometimes the reasons are really true and sensible. It’s completely ok not to get married if you know that it can spoil yours or somebody else’s life.
Smriti Malhotra is a Delhi girl and an avid dreamer. She works at the Embassy of the Republic of Congo by profession but is a writer by passion. She began writing while at school and read more...
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