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The 90’s Girl

The 90’s Girl

The 90s marked a period when society was gradually becoming more modern and open to the idea of women working. It became clear why girls needed to have a strong education. However, despite this understanding, girls were often sent to school with the primary goal of securing marriage proposals. This was because, during the 90s, people preferred to have educated daughters-in-law, but they were not as keen on them being employed, especially in smaller cities.

I was born in 1988, and a few years before my birth, my parents relocated from Rajasthan to Gujarat due to a job opportunity. Looking back, I believe this shift played a significant role in shaping me into the person I am today.

My father was a well read man who firmly believed that both girls and boys should have careers and receive a good education. He instilled this belief in us as well, making sure that we shared the same perspective.

But somehow as a kid i always wanted to get married and be a housewife(though nothing wrong with that) , cause that’s what i saw, My mom, my maasi’s and all my aunts were housewives. And whenever there were weddings they told us one day you also have to get married and become a bride and i was fascinated by all this, cause brides wear beautiful dresses, everyone gives so much attention so as a 10 year old all i wanted to be a bride..


However, for legal marriage, one must be 18 years old. So, I had to wait until then. I patiently waited, and at 18, I was attending college when I met my first boyfriend. I was deeply in love and felt prepared for marriage. Yet, my dad advised me to complete my graduation, secure a job, and then consider marriage. By the time I entered my third year, I came to the realization that I aspired to become a journalist, writer, or work in the media industry. I discussed this with my father, who supported my decision to pursue a postgraduate degree in mass communications and journalism. On the contrary, my boyfriend was opposed to this choice. It was at this juncture that I prioritized my career over the relationship.

Ladies, one thing is certain in life – falling in love is wonderful. However, sacrificing your career or education for anyone is not the right path to follow.

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So I was all heart broken with my past relationship experience, but I was thoroughly enjoying my postgraduate diploma. During this course, I discovered my knack for speaking eloquently, and my family and college peers were quick to encourage me to pursue an internship at a radio station. I followed their advice and landed an internship at a radio station. This experience solidified my desire to work in the radio industry, and in 2011, I secured my first job as a Radio Jockey.

However, my wish to get married remained, and I was even willing to put my career on hold for it. During an arranged marriage meeting, the potential groom asked if I intended to continue working after the wedding. I confidently replied with a “yes,” only to be met with the response that they preferred a daughter-in-law who didn’t work. Mentally prepared for this possibility, I was willing to let go of my job.

The turning point came the next day when I received a notification from my bank – my first salary had been deposited. I immediately contacted my parents and informed them that I couldn’t marry someone who had issues with my career. Looking back, this stands as one of the most pivotal decisions of my life.

As time went on, I never regretted my choice. In fact, I met my husband at my workplace, which felt like fate aligning with my career path.

This is where I truly grasped the significance of independence. It became clear that the decision to work or not work should rest solely on your own choices, without being influenced by family, a husband, or anyone else.


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