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We women take so much effort in keeping our house spik and span, then why do we neglect our health so much?
“Baipan Bhaari Deva” is the second Marathi movie of recent times that I find is feminist in the real sense, first was Jhimma, just because it was released before the former one!
The plot of the movie starts with an urge to win, out of jealousy! Yes, let us all agree we do feel jealous at times.
6 sisters, each one with a different mentality, trait, and behavior pattern, decide to team up and jump on the wagon to win the competition! These sisters who have grown up in pairs because of age relatability, end up being jealous or developing complexes or misunderstandings with the other one from the pair. They still manage to be in touch.
Jaya (played by Rohini Hattangadi) is the eldest. She turns quiet after a major mishap and is left alone by women of her age group thinking there is some issue with her. She feels lonely at times, but her husband is always there with her; from her frequent washroom trips to her counseling sessions, he accompanies her everywhere. When time demands, she does take a tough decision which turns out to be a life savior for someone.
Shashi (played by Vandana Gupte) is a widow. Very practical with thoughts and updated with time. A little dominant, someone who loves herself and believes in herself a little extra, someone who is restless because she thinks her daughter loves the mother-in-law more than the mother, the obvious feeling of trying to keep her daughter close, prove to her that her mother (Shashi) is the BEST at everything is the driving force of the movie; Rather the whole plot has happened because of that only! Well, mothers can tolerate everything except their kids being distant from them!
Sadhana (played by Sukanya Mone) will be relatable to every woman who hassles, tries to make ends meet, and has succumbed to patriarchy. A very innocent, always jumbled and confused kind of woman. I must say, Sukanya Mone has portrayed Sadhana well, because in her real life, she is exactly opposite to Sadhana! She recommends and gets her younger sister placed at her workplace, who apparently becomes Sadhana’s boss later! A woman who makes sure she raises her voice one day, who backs her daughter-in-law when needed, who becomes the shoulder to lean on when her loved ones need her, that’s Sadhana for you!
Ketaki and Pallavi (played by Shilpa Navalakar and Suchitra Bandekar) are twins who have some major issues. In an arranged setup, when a proposal comes for one but the boy chooses the other, that is what happens here. Ketaki always has issues with Pallavi. But when the confident and self-sufficient Pallavi finds it hard to get out of a relationship that is there only for name, it is Ketaki who helps her realize that. The problem with Ketaki is that she feels no one in her family respects or values her because she doesn’t earn money. So she participates in this competition just to encash her chance to win and earn an amount for herself.
Charu (played by Deepa Parab) is a wife to a man who only blames her for every wrong thing, who can’t handle his issues, and who wants her to be his mother instead of his wife! (Well according to me, even a mother should not do that! Came as an eye-opener from this movie only!) Charu is that middle-aged woman who has spent glorious years of her life working, mothering, caring, protecting, and in short stressing, only to realize that all the juggling has resulted in early menopause.
The reason I have described each character without disclosing more about the story (at least tried not to!) is, it will make you visualize a hint of yourself in each one and relate to one of them the most! The story and its execution are entertaining. The songs just rightly timed with the perfect proportion of emotion making the music an integral part of the movie. The finale performance specifically is just the cherry on the cake, so gracefully choreographed and I won’t be surprised to see those sarees come in trend super soon!
I won’t share which one comes from whom, but all of them are a must in a woman’s life.
1)Express yourself as often as possible. When you pile up feelings, you are only adding to misunderstandings, so communicate! Be vocal about your feelings.
2) Being a mother is tough, but you cannot be the priority of your kid always. So accept the fact that they will distance themselves from you at one point in time!
3) There is no shame in feeling and showing the need to be financially independent.
4) Forgive others for yourself. You cannot carry the baggage of a broken relationship throughout your life, so let it go! Remember: holding on to a one-sided relationship is as good as watering a dead plant.
5) When you earn, it is okay to spend on yourself; even if you don’t earn it is! Do not neglect your basic necessities. As a woman, good, comfortable lingerie is a mandate, not a luxury.
6) You are his wife, so be a wife, don’t try to be his mother, even when he says, “You understand na? Please deal with it for me!” You already have a lot on your platter, when you can’t take it, don’t give in to unnecessary drama.
We women take so much effort in keeping our house spik and span, then why do we neglect our health so much? Soul searching and all is fine, but as a matter of fact, well-maintained physical and mental health is equally (if not more!) important. Our body is where our souls reside, so before soul searching, why not make sure the soul is in a safe place?
7) BONUS: When you realize your mistake, a warm, tight hug is enough to convey your apology. Because an apology without a behavior change is just a manipulation, does not hold.
8) SECOND BONUS: Keep taking a break from monotonous daily schedules, not to show that your life happening but to rejuvenate. (Spoiler: the bar scene is the real deal!)
If not anything else, my thirties so far have given me a taste of how female bonds can make life easy. I do not have a sister, but I take this post as an opportunity to thank all those female friends of mine who are like sisters to me. This movie is a must-watch for every woman, even if you are non-Maharastrian, watch it with subtitles. So happy and proud to see such progressive and thoughtful content coming from regional cinema over the big-budget Bollywood movies! Take a bow Kedar Shinde Sir! (Director)
Long Live Female bonds and friendships!
A mother, homemaker, self-published author, founder, and podcast host at Authoropod. read more...
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Does Ranbir Kapoor expressing his preferences about Alia using lipstick really make him a toxic husband?
Sometime back, a video of Alia Bhatt with Vogue went viral where she shares her go-to make-up routine and her unique way to apply lipstick. It went viral not for the quirkiness but because she said that after applying the lipstick, she “rubs it off” because her then boyfriend and now husband – Ranbir Kapoor likes her natural lip colour and asks her to “wipe it off”, whenever they are out on a date night.
Netizens had gone crazy over this video, calling RK toxic and not respecting AB’s choice to wear makeup. I saw the video a couple of times to understand the reason behind the uproar but I failed to understand it. I read many comments and saw people saying that asking your partner or dictating terms on how they should wear makeup is a major sign to leave the person.
Modesty or humility is viewed as the hallmark of a well-brought-up girl, which makes it hard for us to be open to any real compliments without feeling like an imposter.
Why is accepting that compliment so hard?
Colleagues: Have you lost weight? You look good!
She (who has spent months doing Keto and weights): It’s the dress that’s making me look thinner!
Guests: Your house is so beautiful and neat!
She (who spent the last five hours mopping and polishing): It could be tidier; there is just so much dust.
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