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Can 'being a parent' and 'regret' be used in the same sentence? Are we evolved or aware enough to even consider it? Here is a snippet of a conversation on parenthood!
[With modern life comes, modern problems; climate change, inflation, unstable housing market and fear of the next pandemic. And these immediate concerns have put many people from embracing parenthood or forced them to re-examine parenthood from a new angle. The author of this post has provided a point of view, which may or may not align with the readers. The author doesn’t mean to judge anyone’s choices.]
Can ‘being a parent’ and ‘regret’ be used in the same sentence? Are we evolved and/or aware enough to even consider it?
Here is a snippet of a conversation on parenthood!
R says: The other day I read an articlewhich covered some parents expressing regret over
parenthood; so, as a generation are we evolved enough to be able to express regret (if that is
how we feel) over becoming parents?
S says: I’m not sure. I mean, I understand it, and I’m certainly not judging it. It once again boils down to the issue of commitment. Parenting is hard work. And it is a commitment of a lifetime.
And in today’s nuclear family setting, parents are on their own. It is natural to get overwhelmed. It is natural to feel a sense of regret over lost freedom.
You are no longer the same person you once were, and there’s no going back.
My two cents on this: Accept it. Accept that you aren’t perfect and you feel remorse from time to
time. Accept that you cannot give up. Get a babysitter for the nights it gets too much and take
some time out. And move on.
What’s your take?
R says: Well, parenthood is tough. I think different generations has different issues; these days
because of tons of choices available to us, we see what we are missing out on while rearing a
child, and that probably makes one feel miserable.
Am I evolved enough to claim I am miserable when I am; well, yes, I guess.A few generations back or more ago, all that the majority of women were doing: was taking care of their family. Nor was there the pill or concept of family planning, which made parenthood a compulsion. In such a scenario, women of that time, probably if they did not have children; there would be tons of remorse because of the times they were living in.
Hence, now I think this is not a case of evolved minds, it is just a case of changing times!
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We are an author duo who love writing together. We have written a couple of books together, Tete a tete with R&S and Anu and Isha. read more...
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"There is a story and a vision which makes us gravitate towards cinema. Even as we worked as assistants on ads, we realised that cinema was our true calling," say Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh Raseen.
The Railway Men. Mili. Cuttputli. The Diplomat. Bade Miyan Chote Miyan. And more…
Let me introduce to you the talented designer duo who have worked on these, and can be considered today’s upcoming costume designers for the screen. Gunpreet Kaur Mann and Deepali Singh.
Having studied at NIFT, Gunpreet Kaur Mann sent her portfolio out to several designers. Her first gig was as an assistant stylist with Manoshi and Rushi, who also happen to be a designer duo. She worked on an ad film starring Saif Ali Khan and eventually landed a full time job with designer Vikram Phadnis. Years of experience as assistant costume designer followed, which eventually led her to getting a break.
A ‘thank you’ makes a lot of difference in the way any woman in your life sees herself in your eyes. It might even mean the world to her.
I have not received any appreciation in the past. Probably never will. This is the experience of ample women across the globe. The expectation to be thanked for all the sacrifices she makes to keep others happy has faded. Yet the urge to hear few words of acknowledgement always lingers.
There is never a day when she pushes off her own burdens. She knows not to give up on people she loves. Women in general, are givers by nature and hence, give without asking anything in return. They have been the care givers and lovers since centuries however receive no appreciation.
It will mean the world to your mother if you answer her calls. If your sister seems lost give her a hug and assure her about her strengths. Tomorrow, there might come a day when you would have to make your daughter feel empowered with few words of wisdom every now and then. For the children to feel wanted and loved, you must be able to spare some quality time with your wife and be present in the moment.
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